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AIBU?

To think that this is treating these elderly people like children?

78 replies

togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:24

I don't work with the elderly, so if I'm wrong, please enlighten me and I shall happily stand corrected Smile

But, I was watching the local news this evening, and there was a piece on about a local care home. There was a bit where a few of the residents spoke about recent closures of other homes. They spoke clearly, and eloquently.

Yet they were given cups of tea in grey, plastic, two handled cups. Not unlike the ones I give my toddler DC.

I understand that a few of them might be a little unsteady, but you can pick up cups and saucers from Ikea or even charity shops really cheaply. I know my Gran's care home served hot drinks in normal cups.

AIBU to think this is a bit... Well, not very nice actually? They are adults, fgs Hmm

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TattyDevine · 26/02/2013 18:26

I'd be wanting bone china till I needed it by tube Wink

Not sure of the ins and outs but YANBU?

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:26

I know it's a silly thing to be irritated at, but before my Gran died, she used to get upset about the way some people talked down to her, because she was older and a bit hard of hearing.

I feel like this is a bit of an extension of this.

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TattyDevine · 26/02/2013 18:26

Like the idea of Brew by tube, cut out the middle man?

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idshagphilspencer · 26/02/2013 18:27

Yanbu.

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:27

tatty, me too! And tea tastes wrong from plastic cups. And the colours were so dowdy. Just because you're old, doesn't mean you enjoy beige.

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TattyDevine · 26/02/2013 18:28

Totally hate infantising. Recently got arsey because my friend said they were apparently suggesting breath testing pregnant women on some such. Probably not true but the women have to agree to this, for a start. Hypothetically if they were over the limit, then want? Honesty. Grrr.

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cory · 26/02/2013 18:28

What are their joints like? Remember it isn't only about the cost of breaking cups: there is a serious risk of scalding yourself if you can't hold your cup steady whilst drinking tea. And burns on old people heal very, very badly.

I have dodgy joints and used to hold a cup with two hands. Nothing shaming about it, and a lot nicer than ending up with a lapful of tea.

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pickledparsnip · 26/02/2013 18:29

Yanbu. They often seem to get talked to like they are children too. That seriously pisses me off. So disrespectful.

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Bonsoir · 26/02/2013 18:30

Old people are sadly often patronised and infantilised. One of the problems is that aging is not a linear process and skills/abilities decline in unpredictable ways. Some old people may be incontinent (and in nappies) and have poor motor skills (and need a double handed cup) while still being very sound of mind.

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:30

Ooooh tatty Angry you have the patience of a saint, madam!

cory I totally agree, but then surely the care home could assess the risk individually, and ask the client if they'd prefer a plastic/two handled cup? Surely you could have china two handled cups?

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MechanicalTheatre · 26/02/2013 18:31

I hate the way people talk down to oldsters and treat them like they're simple.

I grew up in my gran's house surrounded by old folks. We had a right laugh.

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BadIdeaGenes · 26/02/2013 18:32

I'm currently training to be a nurse and I've read that the double handed plastic cups are recommended to avoid scolds and injuries to individuals whose hands can be unsteady.

But unfortunately it's not uncommon to see the elderly treated like children so I can see why you're riled :(

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TattyDevine · 26/02/2013 18:33

I think you have hit the nail on the head really Toggle, in these situations they should be treated as individuals, same as the "benefits" system, but various factors make that either not possible, or not probable...

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:34

bonsoir patronised! That's the word I was after!

But yes, I'm sure they have their reasons. It just seems so unnecessary.

I seem to remember the tea in my Gran's home was never boiling though; the lady would make the tea in the pot, put it on the trolley and sort the cakes and by the time it got round, it was right drinking temperature. Not cool, or that nasty in between temperature where you kind of gulp it down and whisper 'aaahhhh' afterwards, but drinky temperature. Iyswim Blush

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BadIdeaGenes · 26/02/2013 18:35

X-post, yes individual assessments should really be done. And even if an individual could be at risk of injury they have the right to decline measures such as these cups and having cooler cups of tea if they sign a waiver to say they understand the risk but wish to have hot tea in a china cup.

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:36

But surely you're just as likely to drop a china cup as a plastic one?

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pigletmania · 26/02/2013 18:36

I was going to say te same bad idea. I used to help out in a car home in my teens, tey used to make tea using half milk an haf tea to avid scod and burns Envy though. I recently went into hospital to hv ds an was given t Sam typ o tea [evny]. Not only confined to care homes

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ssd · 26/02/2013 18:36

you are so right op, I totally agree

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idshagphilspencer · 26/02/2013 18:37

Person centred care. Looking at each person as an individual and meeting their individual needs.

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:38

I'd rather have tea pot - hot tea and more milk from a china cup.

I feel like setting up my own tea round in that elderly care home Sad

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togglebobble · 26/02/2013 18:39

Person centred care. Looking at each person as an individual and meeting their individual needs.

Well put!

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DorisIsWaiting · 26/02/2013 18:40

I think it's somewhat unrealistic to assume everyone in the home had the same.

In the home I used to work in those that were able to manage china cups (much heavier than a plastic cup especially when filled with liquid) were given them. Those who had trouble be it lifting the weight of the cup due to arthritis, shaking due to parkinsons etc had the most appropriate thing for them. And yes I can understand prefering a cup but sometimes it is necessary.

So YABU to assume from the sight of some cups that the care home is infantlise these women ( without knowing their medical and care needs).

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41notTrendy · 26/02/2013 18:41

My grandfather behaves like a 6 yr old sometimes (which is a whole other story) but his dignity is paramount. So, no Yanbu. But as you don't know the circumstances then possibly yabu.

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themonsteratemyspacebar · 26/02/2013 18:41

I am a support worker for the elderly and people with dementia.
Most of our residents do use 'normal' cups, there are a few reasons people dont

  • lack of coordination
  • easier to handle (less likely to scald)
  • grip weakens with age, so having two handles will make them feel more secure
  • and the one i was most naive about is the fact that a cup of tea or coffee in a 'normal' cup was alot of the time, too heavy for some people to manage. Usually causing them to not drink alot or end up spilling causing injuries and dehydration through lack of drinks.

One woman i remember clearly we swapped to a two handle plastic cup, which was very light and bright in colour, and now she always drinks all her brew because she can manage it :-)

Try it for yourself, put a brew in a normal cup and another in your childs sip cup, and see the difference.
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BadIdeaGenes · 26/02/2013 18:41

Unfortunately, despite being taught about person centred care and rights of patients as individuals in the new degree, it seems that out in practice the guidelines aren't always followed. What's easiest normally comes above individual care Sad it makes me Angry

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