I have a 5 year old and DP and I have an 8 month old together. I am currently studying for a degree, then will be taking my PGCE and going into teaching. We would both like one, perhaps two, more babies but the problem is timing/money. When I complete my PGCE and go back to work (into teaching) full-time our baby will be 3 years old and will go to nursery school. She has a summer birthday so she will be at primary school the year after. In order to get my career established, I could do with working for at least 2/3 years before having a baby and going on maternity leave. This is the first thing that puts me off as it means that there would be an age gap of 11 years between new baby and DD1 which is pretty big. Also, in an ideal world I would like to be home with baby until they are at least 2.5/3 years old. DP would not be willing to support me financially to do this and has no problem with baby going straight into nursery full-time. Personally, I would rather not have a baby at all than have a baby that is in nursery all day every day. I realise many people do not have a choice in doing this and I am not criticising them; but I do have a choice and I do not want that for my family. DP has said he'll leave it up to me if we have more babies or not and as much as I would love more, having one in full-time nursery is not what I want. I was considering that we could try for one now/soon and so be at home with them while I complete my degree, then do my PGCE when they are 2.5/3 years old. I have enough savings to be able to support myself to be able to do this. DP puts in little input about what he thinks we should do; he agrees that ideally I'd be home with baby til 2.5/3 years but isn't willing to support me in doing so. AIBU to say no to more babies if it means they'd be in nursery for their entire early years?
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AIBU?
to not want another DC if it means they have to be in nursery from being a baby?
29 replies
alisunshine29 · 11/02/2013 13:44
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