To tell them to find their own way to the airport in a foreign country

(580 Posts)
EspressoMonkey Sun 20-Jan-13 09:30:27

First of all, sorry, long story and first world problem.

DH, DCs and i live abroad for DH's job. We live in a rented house close to DH's work as it is not really easy for foreigners to buy property where he works. I miss England and our lovely home there, so last year DH bought me a Ski Chalet as a birthday present / thank you for leaving your family and job in England to follow me around the world, present. He insisted it was my chalet, i could decorate it how i wanted etc, do what i wanted with it.

The chalet is in a fabulous ski resort and to me it is very much our home. We spend most weekends there, we do not rent it out as a holiday chalet.

Last year MIL asked whether HSIL and her uni flat mates could visit for a weeks snowboarding holiday. I was reluctant to agree. DH's does not really know his HSis and when she has visited us in other homes she has been very messy (straightens hair over sink leaving behind lots of hair etc etc) and she never helps out at all. Reluctantly i agreed, MIL insisted her friends were nice and they would help out and babysit DCs in exchange for free board.

HSIL and her friends booked plane tickets which meant they landed late at night with no way of getting to the chalet so DH drove a 6 hour round trip to collect them from the airport.

They have been here all week and as i guessed, have been hard work. They have done nothing to help out around the house, not bothered to help with dinner or clean away afterwards, not helped with DCs or bothed to even buy me a bunch if flowers or some chocs to say thank you for having them. We all eat together but they talk amongst themselves and make little conversation.

On Wednesday DH was called back to work with a crisis, leaving DCs, myself and HSIL and her friends. Since then they have been worse, going out at night and getting drunk and returning at 2/3am and waking DCs and i with their noise. Last night things worsened. DCs and i were woken at 3am, i could hear male voices and smelt cigarette smoke. Our house is strictly non smoking, especially as we have a baby. I went into the lounge and interrupted the party. I asked the young men to stop smoking in my home and to please leave as i didn't know who they were. The young men were local lads and were very apologetic for smoking and waking us and explained they didn't know it was a private home. As they left one of HSIL's friends, under her breath, called me a snotty cow. I turned around and politely challeneged her on her comment. She repeated it and called me an old hag too (34 BTW, she is 20).

I went back to bed fuming and in tears. This morning i woke them all up at 8.00am. They are due to fly back home tonight and i assume were expecting DH or me to take them to the airport. I explained that because DH was not here and because we had had a lot of snow lately and the minibus was snowed in, they could make their own way back to the airport via public transport. I was not driving them 6 hours round trip. They had 12 hours to get back to the airport themselves. The journey is a bus and two train rides and takes a total of 3.5 / 4 hours. An hour later i heard the door bang and went to their rooms. They have left and take all their stuff. They have not said good bye. The room where the two girls were sleeping has been trashed. Make up; lipstick, foundation and other stuff has been smeared into my beautiful new White Company bed sheets. It doesn't look like an accident as it is on all the pillows, duvet and sheet.

I phoned DH at work and told him what had happened. It was a broken line and DH was v. busy at work so i know he wasn't really aware of the whole story as it was hardto talk. But he questioned whether i had checked they had money to get to the airport and whether the trains were running. I hadn't. I have checked since and the trains are running. But have i done the right thing? AIBU?

DeepRedBetty Wed 06-Feb-13 15:26:25

What part of the country you going to be in? Might be able to find you a couple of riding instructors to bring home with you late on the last night, and help drink the most expensive bottle in MIL's drinks cabinet.

EspressoMonkey Wed 06-Feb-13 15:28:49

And back home now but did bump into ski instructors a couple more times. Think DH has scared them off though, he was rather Rottweiler on Sunday when they skied over to say hi. Might as well have cocked his leg on the exterior of the chalet.

Kat101 Wed 06-Feb-13 15:31:36

If she brings up the subject when you are in the uk, tell MIL that after HSIL's visit you are far too traumatised to receive guests at your chalet ever again. You've let them off pretty lightly as a family. Are they all usually this selfish?

Numberlock Wed 06-Feb-13 15:34:48

Not sure how she is freeloading by wanting to visit her son and grandchildren, Betty?

Or why the husband feels threatened by the ski instructors.

Flatbread Wed 06-Feb-13 15:35:07

Lol, Expresso. Sounds like the ski instructors fancy you smile

EspressoMonkey Wed 06-Feb-13 15:36:51

Truely think that DH was swopped in the hospital after birth.

EspressoMonkey Wed 06-Feb-13 15:42:00

Kat other SIL is v. nice, HSIL is carbon copy of MIL.

Flatbread i honestly don't know. Can't help but think it may not be just me they fancy.

hattymattie Wed 06-Feb-13 15:42:21

Must say - if I was MIL I'd have kept a low profile for a while and waited until well after foundationgate before angling for an invitation.

Are they hoping that "D"SIL will return???

Or do they fancy your DH?!

MsVestibule Wed 06-Feb-13 15:50:02

Not sure...why the husband feels threatened by the ski instructors

Perhaps because they're pleasant, young, good looking guys, and they seem to be around a lot, whereas the OP's DH often works away?! If I was the OP's DH, I'd be peeing on the chalet too grin

Numberlock : "Not sure how she is freeloading by wanting to visit her son and grandchildren, Betty?"

Because the visit she was proposing had nothing to do with her son and grandchildren, and everything to do with bribing impressing her new boyfriend! Re :

OP : "Then, on Monday DH came home to tell me MIL had been on the phone. She has a new boyfriend who likes to ski and thought it would be nice if we could meet him. She was hankering after an invitation to visit."

gimmecakeandcandy Wed 06-Feb-13 17:42:51

You MUST update after your visit!

Angelico Wed 06-Feb-13 22:39:03

<Marks place in full expectation of ongoing saga> grin

hattymattie Thu 07-Feb-13 09:47:40

Me too - better than Eastenders; grin

BiddyPop Thu 07-Feb-13 10:12:41

Having "unwatched" this thread on Monday when there were no more updates, I have just put it back on "watch", to see what happens in 2 weeks time!! Have to give your MIL some respect for having the brass neck to be angling for an invite after such recent events!! shock

I'm another one saying take photos and then post them on her fb page showing everyone what a skanky cow she is! grin Seriously, your MIL and you DH need to see exactly what they left you with and YWNBU to let them find their own way to the airport.

No idea what happened then, grin I only saw the first 8 posts before I wrote mine. How odd.

DeepRedBetty Thu 07-Feb-13 10:22:34

WhereYouLeftIt Thanks for explaining where I was coming from to Numberlock - that's exactly what I meant grin

Are the ski-ing instructors in the same league as Maryz's firemen?

TooExtraImmatureCheddar Thu 07-Feb-13 10:43:49

Oooh, an update will be required!

<shameless place-marking>

porridgeLover Thu 07-Feb-13 11:02:22

Nothing of any value whatsoever to add.
Just want to keep my nose in blush
Fascinated. Brass balls on MIL.

How on earth could your MiL even HINT at such a thing she should be embarrassed by her HSil !

allthatglittersisnotgold Thu 07-Feb-13 12:47:11

I have read post cover to cover, I regret not gathering up dog, a blanket and glass of wine first. Wretched little toe rags those girls and the mil. Sympathies to you OP. I have shamelessly marked place for the trip update. Anyone else overly keen for hsil to get come uppence? Good luck OP.

pluCaChange Thu 07-Feb-13 15:08:42

As I see it, MIL has committed to pretending there's nothing wrong, so is behaving as though she's welcome to the chalet at any time, with a standing invitation.

allthatglittersisnotgold Tue 19-Feb-13 12:36:38

Any updates?

Hissy Tue 19-Feb-13 13:08:03

well within protocol to subtelly mention that from now on, you have a zero guest policy.

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