To think that my friend is being a bit rude?

(134 Posts)
awaiting2013 Mon 31-Dec-12 10:24:02

A few weeks ago I invited my friend over for NYE. We both have young children and not much cash so I asked her if she wanted to come over, bring the kids (let them sleep if she wishes) and spend NYE or part of it with us. Bring a bottle, let's have a drink and I'll knock up some food. She told me that since she had no plans, sounded like a good one. A few days ago I sent her an email asking if she was still coming over etc. and she said yes.

Imagine my surprise yesterday when I saw on her FB page that she was asking around as to who was available on NYE and if anyone wanted to go out for a meal and drinks on the town with her and her DH?

So I'm sitting here on NYE, just me and DH and the kids. Not too bothered as TBH not fussed about NYE. We need to save hard. However I am feeling a bit angry because my no. 1 NY resolution is not to be so fucking nice (sorry!) to people who are crap to me and my family and to not let people get away with crap behaviour.

AIBU to be a bit pissed off that my friend has not even bothered to say she is not coming over because she has hedged her bets and got a better offer?

is she not coming over? or are you actually babysitting? I would make very sure.

Inertia Mon 31-Dec-12 10:26:10

Best make sure she doesn't think you're babysitting her kids !

MrsKeithRichards Mon 31-Dec-12 10:26:51

oh dear it does sound like she is looking for a better offer which is rude. Deep breath, pick up the phone and ask her.

Phone her and ask what's going on?

If she waffles and lies then cancel and make it clear how you feel

Montybojangles Mon 31-Dec-12 10:29:26

I'd have to post a rather bitchy comment on her fb post to be honest. Have a nice relaxing evening with DH and kiddies.

MagicHouse Mon 31-Dec-12 10:29:56

Ask her what's going on! Just text to say you're confused, you thought you'd arranged that she'd be with you, but on FB she thinks she's going out. If she claims she was confused and thinks you were babysitting, make sure you say no!!

AppleOgies Mon 31-Dec-12 10:30:54

Just post... 'Errrrmmm I thought you were coming to mine for nye?'

AlistairSim Mon 31-Dec-12 10:30:57

Yes, she is being rude!

But please call her and check that she's not expecting you to babysit.

I'd be tempted to post a reply saying you thought she was coming to yours. What a crappy thing for her to do. Are you very close?

BodyOfEeyore Mon 31-Dec-12 10:32:33

I would reply on Facebook and ask her if she's no longer coming over.

Actually on re-reading OP it looks possible that she thinks that she has a free pass to visit you for part of the evening then leave kids sleeping. Make sure she knows that isn't the case.

Yes write

Assume you and your family are no longer coming to mine as we arranged?
Thanks for letting us know, happy new year to you and yours you compleate wank badger

BodyOfEeyore Mon 31-Dec-12 10:35:25

An yes, you said part of it. Maybe she wants to go out first.

SunflowersSmile Mon 31-Dec-12 10:35:30

My oh my how cheeky and rude.
Please don't babysit for the entitled Madam...

awaiting2013 Mon 31-Dec-12 10:36:34

I don't think she thinks I am babysitting as she can get her mum or MIL to do it for her. If she did turn up with her kids for me to mind I would just say no anyway. I was actually doing her a favour because she seems to be pretty broke.

Monty, I think I am going to do that actually. I'll wait until tomorrow morning because she nearly always posts a note about OMG, I was so wasted last night and had such a great time etc.

Really not fussed she isn't coming over. Just annoyed that yet again I get dumped on from a great height.

2012, please let me go to sleep a big softie and 2013 please let me wake up a nasty bitch.

fuzzpig Mon 31-Dec-12 10:37:13

If this was arranged a little while ago is there a chance she's genuinely forgotten?

(Trying to be charitable... If not, then I like the term 'wankbadger')

SantasENormaSnob Mon 31-Dec-12 10:38:00

Yanbu

She is very rude.

fuzzpig Mon 31-Dec-12 10:38:18

I think you should post today rather than tomorrow - at least you'll know for certain then. And possibly embarrass her grin

manicbmc Mon 31-Dec-12 10:38:24

Definitely make sure she isn't expecting you to babysit. And if she is, stick to your guns and make sure she knows that isn't going to happen.

What a cheek!

chicaguapa Mon 31-Dec-12 10:38:36

Another one who thinks you might end up babysitting. Make sure you have a response prepared.

People seem to not realise how FB works. We were going to stay at a friend's on the way home from MIL's and were asked not to go because they had the norovirus. Cue getting home to see many photos on FB from a meal out in a pub! hmm

mellen Mon 31-Dec-12 10:38:53

It does look like she might think you are babysitting, if you said 'part of it', she might have decided that as long as they put in an appearance that you will take the kids for the night?

FestiveFiggy Mon 31-Dec-12 10:39:13

U definitely need to ask her what's going on.....and then come back and tell us what she said grin

digerd Mon 31-Dec-12 10:39:29

She sounds very manipulative and deceitful - beware.!

ifancyashandy Mon 31-Dec-12 10:41:05

Don't do the passive-aggressive 'posting tomorrow after the event' thing. Its horrible and childish. Call her. Be the grown up.

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