My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

PIL dog - advice please

266 replies

MTBMummy · 28/12/2012 20:19

We're currently visiting the in laws for Xmas an their dog has just gone for me, u bent downto give him a sausage and he went for my face - punctured my eyelid and caused a blood blister and a lot of bruising - I'll be getting one of them to take me to the doctor tomorrow morning, they're very rural, and everyone has had a bit too much to drink, so cannot drive.

This in itself is bad enough, but the dog shortly after snapped at dd and hurt her hand - he did not draw blood, but obviously scared her.

My question is how do I handle this - in laws are brushing it under the carpet - I've not been able to speak to DP alone since it happened. But I just want to leave, I am worried about going to the doctor, will I have to report the dog? It's not the first time he's had a go at me, but it is the first time he's made contact.

I'm kind of scared of the dog an can't stand being around it or even have DD in the same room - and I'm normally a massive dog person.

Aside from a banging headache I'm ok, I've cleaned it up and taken some ibuprofen, it's a bit swollen and bruised but I think it'll be ok.

Any ideas on how to handle this?

OP posts:
Report
kinkyfuckery · 28/12/2012 20:20

Oh my goodness, I wouldn't be happy at all, two attacks in one go - has the dog ever been aggressive before that you know of? What is your partner saying about it?

Report
Chottie · 28/12/2012 20:24

I would be out of there by now with DD. I don't have any dog experience, but I would not be giving that dog another opportunity to have a go at either myself or DD.

I would go to the doctor and get checked out. Tell him what happened too.

Report
LittleMissNorty · 28/12/2012 20:24

I would not be in the same room as the dog without one of them being present to control it Hmm and I would openly, in front of them, tell any of my DC's they are not allowed anywhere near it.

Report
DontmindifIdo · 28/12/2012 20:27

Report the dog! If it had done the same thing to your DD how would you feel?

Tell your DH you want to leave after seeing the Doctor (take DD with you to the doctors, do not leave her with that dog) and refuse to return when that dangerous dog is there. How DH tells his parents this is his problem.

Report
WelshMaenad · 28/12/2012 20:27

The dog needs to be locked away. I would be making plans to leave ASAP and not be returning unless the issue is properly dealt with.

Can you get a taxi to a minor injuries or a&e? I really think any injury to the eye needs to be seen ASAP.

Report
PartridgeInASpicyPearTree · 28/12/2012 20:27

I'm a doggy person and if they were not prepared to separate the dog I would be leaving. I don't understand their approach at all - the dog is clearly not happy either!

Report
SantasENormaSnob · 28/12/2012 20:28

What dontmind said.

Report
MTBMummy · 28/12/2012 20:28

He's been aggressive towards me - but more posturing than actual aggression - he's never bitten before as far as I know.

DP is avoiding being alone with me, and I dont want to raise it in front of everyone as te relationship with the PIL's is strained enough already

OP posts:
Report
eltsihT · 28/12/2012 20:29

My granny's dog bit my son on the side of his head when he was 9 months old. Granny and dog are old and a bit crabby, we had been watching my son and dog v carefully and it just happened, luckily no scaring but needless to say dog and son were not and have not been in the same room since. I didn't feel I could report her or the dog, i love her and she love the dog it's really all that keeps her going.

the incident happened over a year ago and I still keep dog and son very much apart, my granny has also not had the dog in the same room as a toddler/baby since so I don't feel I was wrong not reporting it.

Dog bite don't tend to lead to infections so I am sure you will be ok, just do what you feel is right in your heart.

Report
MTBMummy · 28/12/2012 20:30

Sadly the hospital is over an hour away and I don't drive, I really want to leave - but I dont think DP will want to leave.

May look at catching a train home with DD tomorrow.

OP posts:
Report
cathpip · 28/12/2012 20:33

The dog should be put away in another room and not allowed near people it is not that familiar with. With xmas and lots of people drinking its safer that the dog be somewhere quiet. I would have stern words with your pil's about the dog and esp your dd, this dog is capable of doing a lot of damage and if they make no efforts to control it tell them you will report it and you will not be visiting till dog is controlled safely, am furious for you, seriously bad dog ownership on your pil's part.

Report
MTBMummy · 28/12/2012 20:34

That's the problem if he'd done this to DD - it would be no question, I would demand we went to A&E and left, as its me, I just feel I have to turn a blind eye for the sake of the in laws

FWIW - dd was not Lone with dog when it happened, FiL was in the room and I was across the room. DD was throwing the ball for the other dog, and this dog just snapped at her empty hand, it covered about a metre in a fraction of a second

OP posts:
Report
WelshMaenad · 28/12/2012 20:34

Fuck what he wants, you and your child have both been attacked by their dog! Is there not a friend or neighbour who can take you tonight to be seen? I'm concerned about the risk if infection in your eye. Where are you?

I would get out if there as soon as you can by whatever means possible if they are not taking this seriously.

Report
festivelyfocussed · 28/12/2012 20:35

Poor thing. I agree with dontmindifido. How bloody annoying that no one is takIng this seriously. Get out, keepdc away from dog (avoid being on the news as the family who's dog had never attacked a child before now...) and have dh talk to your PILs.

Report
MTBMummy · 28/12/2012 20:36

Entirely agree on the bad ownership - dogs have had no training and on a previous visit to us, when I kicked dog to remove it from my cat who it ha pinned on the ground and taken a bite out of, I was told the dog was just playing and not to overact.

Definitely will not be returning or having them over with dogs until this is resolved
Just so cross

OP posts:
Report
Sargesaweyes · 28/12/2012 20:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BoerWarKids · 28/12/2012 20:38

I love dogs and I'm horrified by this, OP!

I can't believe your PIL are pushing it under the carpet, it could be your DD with a bleeding, punctured eyelid Shock

I think you should leave with your DD as soon as you possibly can.

At some point you need to raise this issue with PIL, but right now, get medical attention.

Hope you're ok x

Report
MTBMummy · 28/12/2012 20:39

DD is in bed, and I'm in the room next door - on my phone (hence the awful typing) my eye is a bit sore, but mainly just have a headache which means I can't stand the noise Of the telly.

Dogs are unable to get into the rooms - although tempted to stay with DD tonight just to be sure

OP posts:
Report
phantomnamechanger · 28/12/2012 20:40

children should not be left alone with dogs, NOT EVER, especially visiting children who are invading a dogs territory when they are not used to kids.

I saw a story about a bay being killed by a terrier, family pet, a few weeks ago, bloody awful.

you cannot risk anything else happening for the sake of not wanting to hurt these peoples feelings about their dog - it is a pet and yes they love it, but they have to put people first.

My parents have a year old dog - shes a softie and loves the DC - but we would NEVER leave them alone with the dog even for a minute, and if she ever went for one of us, that would be it - i would just say we were not preared to visit unless the dog was locked in another room or the garden for the duration.

How are the owners reacting to all this - are they trying to play it down and make excuses for the dog, or are they horrified and dealing responsibly with this unacceptable behaviour??

Report
dwagdays · 28/12/2012 20:40

The dog can do what it wants in its own home, you won't be asked to report it. I can see you might not want to as things are fraught.

However, don't leave your dd in the same room as the dog. Don't leave her with the grandparents or dp if you think they will. I love dogs but this is a dangerous situation. Any vet or behaviourist would say the same.

Sorry you haven't got your dp as a support. Sounds horrid.

Report
peaceandlovebunny · 28/12/2012 20:41

keep out of the dog's way. it needs puttting down but that probably won't happen.

Report
WelshMaenad · 28/12/2012 20:42

Please promise you will be at a hospital or walk in type centre first thing? I'm worried about that eye. I don't suppose you're in the south-to-mid Wales area? If you are I will come and get you!!

Report
mrslaughan · 28/12/2012 20:42

I am a dog lover - but that is agressive behaviour and completely unacceptable. This not a case of dog being teased.

Dog needs to be either PTS (I am sure that suggestion would go down like a cup of cold sick) or out of house for duration of your visit, no contact with DD, and I would say you.

If they weren't prepared to accept that I would leave....actually I would not stay in a house with a dog like that - and I grew up on farms with dogs, my whole life. That dog see's itself further up the pecking order of the "pack" (family) than you and DD - and that is dangerous.

Scars from dog bites/attacks can be horrendous.

your DP is being an arse - not so dear.......

I don't know what the laws are in UK, but in NZ if you complained to authorities about a dog doing that to you it would be PTS - PIL wouldn't have a leg to stand on.

Report
BoerWarKids · 28/12/2012 20:42

Why is your DP avoiding you?

Report
breatheslowly · 28/12/2012 20:42

In my family a dog that bit (broke skin) unprovoked would be put down (or at a push rehomed). Obviously you can't make them put the dog down, but I would make it clear that none of you will be in the room/house again with the dog there.

For tonight I would get a cab to A&E to have the dog bite looked at (it is likely to get infected as dog saliva is full of bacteria) and close to the eye is a massive risk. Call a cab and if you don't have cash then you can check that they will take a card. Take DD with you.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.