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AIBU?

To wonder how you could get to 21 weeks pregnant without noticing?

71 replies

KnitFastDieWarm · 05/12/2012 11:47

I know it happens, but it still amazes me!

My friend (22) discovered she was 5 months pregnant yesterday. She and bf (30) are thrilled - but they live with her mum (who is not thrilled, to say the least) and he's recently been fired, so money is very tight. She's also been drinking and smoking for the past five months blissfully unaware that she was pregnant :(

I'm very happy for them both, but I'm obviously vey worried about the health of the baby given her drinking, smoking etc prior to finding out. I'm also genuinely amazed that she didn't notice - she says she can feel it kicking, but she thought she had an upset stomach!

Anyone experienced a surprise pregnancy? Reassure me (so I can reassure her!)

OP posts:
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TwasTheDawnDeeforeXmas · 05/12/2012 11:50

Not me but a girl at work got to 6 months before finding out. She only put on a tiny bit of weight....she genuinely had no clue. Found out in early january so just after all the christmas/new year drinking sessions! Went on to have a lovely bouncy baby boy!

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FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda · 05/12/2012 11:50

I didn't find out until I was 11 weeks. I'm 19 weeks today and don't think I could have missed the whopping bump but I think I'm the exception with such a whopper at this stage.

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MolotovCocktail · 05/12/2012 11:53

You're not lone in wondering. I can understand up to te point of the baby moving, but not after that. Maybe it's a limitation in my imagination it's not I'm Confused by it, too.

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chrismissymoomoomee · 05/12/2012 11:54

A realtive of mine wasn't aware of her pregnancy until she gave birth. She had actually lost weight, had her periods etc, went for a hot shower to get rid of her back pain and had a baby.

Someone else I know had a relative ask her if she was pregnant, they got a digital test, it said 1-2 weeks, they booked in for an emergency scan (can't go into too much detail) a few days later and she was in labour.

Both children were absolutely fine.

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AnyaKnowIt · 05/12/2012 11:56

I can believe it, I was on the pill so no periods, no morning sickness by 20 weeks I didn't have a bump or feel movements. The only thing that have it away was my cravings for KFC

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Plomino · 05/12/2012 11:57

Easily.

Didn't find out about DS1 until week 26 . No sickness, had an odd cycle anyway so no clue there , tiny amount of back pain but put that down to a shitty mattress , no signs whatsoever . Chased a suspect for over a mile down Kensington High Street , and then caught and cuffed him at about week 24 . Did a test a week later , went for a dating scan , and freaked out the midwife ! DS1 is now 17 and 6 ft 2 . Then went on to do much the same with DS2 (found out at wk 18 ) DS3 (wk 17) DS4 (wk 19) and DD1 ( wk 13) . They just hide away , and let me know eventually .

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kissmyshineymetalass · 05/12/2012 11:59

I didn't find out till I was 28weeks on my DD,I had the implant so it didn't even enter my mind that I could be pregnant,I didn't have a bump and I was still wearing my size ten jeans.i found out cause I could feel the baby move.

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FeckOffCup · 05/12/2012 11:59

It's quite easy to mistake stomach digestion processes for baby kicks and vice versa, I've had what felt like baby kicks a few times and I'm not pregnant so I can see how movements would be easy to shrug off if you weren't TTC. Some people are lucky in that they have no sickness or other obvious symptoms, a girl I used to work with sadly had quite a late miscarriage and didn't even know she was pregnant until she started bleeding heavily and having very painful cramps.

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KatoPotatoHoHo · 05/12/2012 12:09

I was 20weeks. Very tired but put that down to working 60hr weeks. Lost weight, still taking pill and having a show.

Finally came to crunch when we went to the Edinburgh festival and I felt sick as a dog, came home and DM declared I was pregnant. I bought a test to rule it out and found out I was '2-3' weeks pregnant! (They don't go any higher!'

Went for an accurate dating scan and found out I was at least 20 weeks.

It happens. And not just to dafties in Take-a-break!

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Pickles77 · 05/12/2012 12:11

I didn't know until 22.5 weeks. No signs no nothing. Had fallen off horses and everything.
Wish I'd found out sooner as my whole life disintegrated pretty quickly Confused

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BrianCoxIsAChristmasPud · 05/12/2012 12:17

Am sat here, 22 weeks pregnant and being used as my Boy's personal punch bag, with a face like this Shock

I didn't feel much movement until about 2 weeks ago though, so can understand the digestion/baby movement thing.

Fancy finding out so late - I've needed the full 9 months to get my head round everything Grin

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SantaIAmSoFuckingRock · 05/12/2012 12:22

ex colleague was 7 months when she found out. had always had irregular periods and didn't gain any weight at all until after she found out. she had a healthy baby boy.

i regulary get sensations in my tummy, like wind bubbles passing through that feel identical to what the earlier baby movements felt like when i was pregnant so i can understand how someone might not recognise movement as odd or as a baby moving.

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HazleNutt · 05/12/2012 12:24

My sis was 20 weeks, also erratic cycles and she didn't put on any weight and didn't show at all, even though she's very slim.
Of course she ate everything you're not supposed to, did everything, drank and smoked. Niece is a healthy smart and pretty 7-year old now.

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PrincessScrumpy · 05/12/2012 12:24

My cousin didn't know until she gave birth - bled throughout and even in hospital (after ambulance took her in for severe abdominal pains) my auntie suggested her dd looked like she was in labour and the doctor dismissed it - 4 hours later she had a 9lb baby!

I however wat in maternity clothes by 13w with dd1 and dtds... well I was showing at 8w. She was fairly large to start with whereas I have a small frame. Her son is now 11 and she is still amazed that she didn't know herself but she was 19 and very immature at the time.

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RabbitsMakeGOLDBaubles · 05/12/2012 12:30

Never felt any of my movements for definite until about 22/23 weeks, and have erratic periods, so I could see how it would happen if you are caught up in life. Minimal symptoms, gaining a bit of weight, maybe upset tummy feelings and some nausea, all easily explained by other things.

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AboutThyme · 05/12/2012 12:30

Friend of mine didn't find out until she was nearly 30 weeks. No sickness, no bump, she put on maybe 4-5lbs and attributed it to 2 recent holidays, she had periods, she drank, she smoked and only found out when she went went to the GP complaining of constipation! Her son is 18 now, perfectly healthy 6 foot lad!

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DinosaursOnAnAdventCalender · 05/12/2012 12:34

I found out at just over 3 months but I can understand how people can kiss the symptoms.

I'm 32 weeks now and only just seem to be getting a bump, I'm a size 14 normally haven't put much weight at all on. I also have an anterior placenta so didn't feel movements until past 28 weeks.

I had nausea and sickness but it would've been easy to put it down to stomach bugs. I wasn't having periods due to still breastfeeding ds3, even if I'd just stopped I'd have put the lack if periods down to my body readjusting.

I only found out because all of a sudden ds3 refused breast milk and ds1 had done exactly the same when I'd gotten pregnant with ds2 so thought uh-oh.

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fedupwithdeployment · 05/12/2012 12:34

My friend (a medic) found out at 17 weeks...she had wierd periods and was having a scan to check an ovarian cyst the size of a melon when she had the baby pointed out to her. It was a shock, but she has since had nos 2 and 3 and all is hunky dory!

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sparkle12mar08 · 05/12/2012 12:37

There's a MNer who didn't find out until she was in labour and was out partying the day before in a midriff baring top - she was flat stomached! Can't remember the name though, Stranded possibily?

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TwasTheDawnDeeforeXmas · 05/12/2012 12:39

Think it might be Stealth something sparkle?

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freddiefrog · 05/12/2012 12:39

My SiL was about 26 weeks when she found out

She says now, with hindsight, all the signs were there, but she was on the pill, her DH was working away a lot so there wasn't a lot of bedroom action going on, still having regular periods, no weight gain to speak of (she'd put on a few pounds but just put it down to eating junk whike her DH was away) so she just never considered that she could be pregnant.

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SantaWearsGreen · 05/12/2012 12:39

If I hadn't have been so ill with DS I wouldn't have known. I found out at 6 weeks because I went to the dr saying I felt sick all of the time, lol.. I was so naive. It didn't enter my mind, I was on the pill and because of illness and stress my periods had been irregular. If that pregnancy had been like my other two with no sickness christ knows when i'd have found out.

Some people don't gain weight or are already obese so that extra weight is hidden iyswim. Some put the movements down to indigestion, the sickness down to a bug, the headaches down to stress etc. Many actually are either on contraception so think there's no way it can happen or they have been told they either won't conceive or its highly unlikely.

Its easy to see how it happens really. I know a girl who didn't find out til she was 7 months gone. She just didn't gain any weight, I saw the pictures of her literally a week before she found out and her stomach is washboard. I don't know where the baby goes but there you go!

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sparkle12mar08 · 05/12/2012 12:42

Something beginning with S, definitely TwasTheDawnDeeforeXmas!

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VisualiseAHorse · 05/12/2012 12:45

My sister's mate had a 'surprise' baby earlier this year. Thought she had appendicitis. Nope, it was a baby! She was quite chunky though, and was still having periods.

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VisualiseAHorse · 05/12/2012 12:46

StealthOtter is famous on MN for having a surprise baby.

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