I wince when women refer to being a mum as "a job"

[CQuin]

It's so mimsy ish, so martyr and yet at the same time.

Our parents would never have said this, is it just the heightened expectations everyone has for everything thee days ?
Would dads say this?

Eg I have two jobs, I'm a mother (or worse "mummy ") and a hat maker." (or whatever )


Fuck off.

[CQuin]

Yet at the same time smug.

I deleted smug. In a fit of ire ;)

[EverythingsDozy]

I think being a mum is hard work but not necessarily a job. I tell my husband I've been working just as hard as he has.
But then, I don't like to class myself as unemployed so whenever anyone asks I say housewife.

[ditavonteesed]

meh

[MrsMushroom]

I don't give a bugger what you call it. Or anyone else. If it makes them happy so be it. You call it what you want and don't judge others for their choices. YABU to wince. There are worse things.

[RedZombie]

I was chit chatting with some sales rep recently who said, when I asked of his wife works, said 'he has the hardest job a woman can have, she's a full time mother'. I wanted to punch the smugness right out of him.

I loathe the term 'full time mother'.

[LRDtheFeministDude]

I wince when women make woman-bashing comments from a position of smug ignorance, but hey, what can you do?

You do know people get paid to do childcare, right?

[Frontpaw]

If it was a job you'd get a holidays and sick pay. Its your whole bloody life!

[ChestnutsRoastingonaWitchesTit]

Yeh me too but I wince even more when people ask me what I do.

[girlgonemild]

I think yabu. It's a way of women trying to get a little respect for their role as mum in a society which only really values money making status building employment. I'm guessing people who say that are just saying being a mum is equal to any other job.

[TeeElfOnTeeShelf]

Sorry, am I suppose to think it's all puppies and kittens and sweetness and light?

It's not. It's bloody hard work. And the pay is crap. Not to mention the sick leave and holiday time.

If it's not a job, then what is it?

[craftynclothy]

When people ask me what I do, tbh I have no idea what to answer and tend to give a rambling long-winded explanation that I'm predominantly a SAHM but I also teach craft workshops occasionally (like one every month or two) and that I'm also a student with the OU. I don't really mean that I class being a SAHM as a job but it's what takes up most of my time.

If I'm asked on any forms what my occupation is I put down that I'm self-employed (job title depends on the form).

I wouldn't expect Dh to say "Dad & Software Developer" just because his job is full-time. Actually I wouldn't expect it for a part-timer with regular hours either. I think it's because my work is more ad-hoc.

[iwillsleepagainsomeday]

being a responsible adult is a hard 'job'. Wether you work a paid job or take care of family and home, that does not really matter. You still have to do things that tire you, things you don't like to do, things that you do like etc etc.

[cornycarrotshack]

I have several jobs. I include couch surfer.

[IveBeenGoodSantaIPromise]

It's not a job but it is hard work.

But the term 'full time mum' is the worst - every mum is the world is a full time mum whether they also go out and work or not.

[ifso]

Does it really matter what other women do or don't do though?

Does it really matter THAT much? To get so angry about it?

[purrpurr]

YABU. Every element of being a mother combined would command a £60,000 a year salary.

I think it's martyrish to say it's NOT a job, as if to say "It's just something I have to do, no one else will do it..." Insert sigh, eye roll, shrug and/or various other passive aggressive body language displays. How is it not a job?

[TantrumsAndBalloons]

Ugh I hate "full time mum"

I don't become a part time mother when I walk out of the door to go to work.
SAHP don't become part time parents when their DCs go to school.

[FabulousFreaks]

I think it is a reaction to the fact that mums get so little respect for what they do

[SolomanDaisy]

So CQuin, what do you do?

[RabbitsMakeGOLDBaubles]

Well when there is a box to put occupation in, I have to put mum, because I don't want to put disabled drain on society, or Nothing. We do have to quantify the amount of time and effort that goes into parenting, lots of people don't.

[HECTheHallsWithRowsAndFolly]

Depends what you understand a job to be

If you think that for something to be a job, a person has to get paid for it then you're right. Being a parent is not a job.

If, however, you take the broader meaning of the word job - ie anything someone is required or expected to do, their responsibilities, their duties - then it is a job. When you choose to have a child, caring for that child becomes a job that is required of you.

[justmyview]

In RL, I don't come across people saying this. I agree that being a Mum is not a job. To me a job = paid employment, although I acknowledge that others take a different view

[Whodhavem]

And when parents say they are "babysitting" thier own children!

[CQuin]

In have two jobs. Neither is "being a mum"
No idea why you need to know !

[Kayano]

It pisses me off

'I'ma full time mum.'

As opposed to what? A part time mum?