To think recovery from a csection is not necessarily harder than from a vb?

(150 Posts)
Cathycomehome Wed 21-Nov-12 23:18:08

Have had both. Second ELCS because of secondary tokophobia. I have a friend who is militant about home birth/natural childbirth. She states on her facebook pages"Recovery from section is painful, hard and unpleasant."

Not in my case.

I would have no issue if she'd said "can be", like I might say, "recovery from vb CAN BE painful, hard and undignified".

She also said to my face that "women like me" cause fear and put people off natural childbirth.

iismum Thu 22-Nov-12 20:45:41

I had two EMCS after long, difficult labours and recovered just fine. I was thankful to avoid the tearing/incontinence/horrible piles, etc, that some of my friends suffered.

Cathycomehome Thu 22-Nov-12 20:46:30

Sorry, late back to thread, it's been very interesting. I'm glad I do t seem to BU on this one, I think I'll have to hide my friend as I find her views extreme and upsetting. I liked her very much once, but we seem to have less in common not more since she had her children and I had my ds2.

mathanxiety Thu 22-Nov-12 21:19:52

<You can avoid incontinence if you are diligent about Kegel exercises. They are not a necessary accompaniment to VBs even if you are half diligent, but Kegels will really help.>

mathanxiety Thu 22-Nov-12 21:21:54

What is wrong with your friend to make her so extreme and nasty I wonder? It's not normal to hold opinions that disparage others' experiences to such an extreme degree, and be so insistent on being so forthright that you don't care about potentially alienating friends.

loveroflife Fri 23-Nov-12 11:58:23

Jumping on this thread as am expecting no.2 and after an emc with no.1 have been offered an elc this time?

I am now considering going for it because I am petrified about giving birth and reacted badly to the epidural last time (got stuck at 7cm after a 2 day labour) and feel sick at the thought of having to repeat that again.

However, is the milk supply not hugely delayed with an elc? What would happen if it didn't come in for a couple of days, how would the baby get fed?

frumpet Fri 23-Nov-12 12:11:19

First birth VB , ventouse extraction , a billion stiches , couldnt sit down comfortably for about 4 weeks
Second birth VB , mild graze , slight stinging when having a wee , otherwise felt perfectly normal
third birth crash section , felt ok after about a week and a half , normal after three .

Your so called 'freind' has stopped having babies has she ? My third birth started as a homebirth . You never actually know what is going to happen during the birth until it happens regardless of all your predjudices and best laid plans .

elizaregina Fri 23-Nov-12 13:17:02

strange that most people who are open to ELC are also open to HB and VB but alot of militancy the other way from the HB crowd.

I really really dislike people saying that people who air thier birth stories are trying to compete in gore and drama and whose was worse.

Redtoothbrush is so eloquent I wish I could put my points across lilke you but you have summed it all up so well.

Its VITAL that women talk about birth and thier stories and experiences, once info is out there...you can choose to take it how you wish ignore - take with pinch of salt etc...but for goodness sake dont make women feel bad for talking about what happened to them,

I have been alert to birth stories nearly all my life since I was very young as I have always been afraid of it -not once have I ever heard a woman bragging or talking in a seemingly " competitive" way about how - awful her birth was. Not once in all the toddler groups - nct etc I have been to has anyone said in a braggy way " oh yes i tore like buggery down there will never pee again"...

Who would suggest such things> It sounds like north korean thinking to me - supress surpress surpress and make women feel bad about talking and sharing!

I like you cathy had a textbook birth but that was awful for me, and then an ELC.

From the panic attack I had - ( mild ) on entering theatre I did realise that is my way - i am very emotional and a thinker and I did panic but the panic didnt last very long whereas it didnt stop duiring my first labour which went on for hours.

I had a glorious first day cuddling the baby and had no problems changing the nappy on the hospital bed - feeding baby and cuddling which is all you can do with a new born and all you are supposed to do anyway!

My experience was marred dreadfully by a nasty MW coming round telling me curtly about 8 hours after op that i need to " turn" i did a massive twist - pulled or did some damage and was in alot of pain in that point afterwards.

If it wasnt for that I would have been totally fine.

Its GREAT to feel my pelivc floor - and have all down below nicely intact, its great not to have lower back pain, and to be able to use the loo in comfort.

Its not great to have pain on side - after twist or being limited once home - I had alot of help. I am not sure what I would go for if I had a third...but comparing a text book birth with elective - recovery from both was hard but in very different ways....pain wise - i was def in more pain down below and in my vback after normal birth - pain with elctive was minimal

Chopsypie Fri 23-Nov-12 13:27:40

I dont think the way baby comes out matters one bit.
I know friend who have had C sections and had horrific recovery, and some friends who have had natural births who have struggled to recover.

I dont see how/why people get so annoyed by other peoples choices. I did pregnancy yoga and my teacher was a HB/BF/baby carrying 'earth mother' (her term not mine) who had had 3 babies at home naturally. But one of her main points wen discussing birth was always to do what was best for you and your baby, and bugger anyone elses expectations.

She really gave me and the other in our class a sense of confidence that we understood the process, and were perhaps better prepared mentally to try and give birth naturally, but she also made sure we knew what was what with interventions, and also some other options to make the interventiona bit easier.

I think we need more people like her, and less of the 'I think its best, so it must be'

That got a bit long and ramble-y but it makes me so sad

TroublesomeEx Fri 23-Nov-12 13:28:16

Wow.

I had an EMCS. If I hadn't, my baby would have died.

Your friend can fuck off frankly!

bishboschone Fri 23-Nov-12 13:36:37

I have had both . A horrendous vb with ventouse and episiotomy and a calm section . The section was undoubtably much more painful and took longer to recover . You are cut in half for goodness sakes !!! I would still have a section given the choice . My vb frightened the shit out of me !!sad

I think your friend would benefit from watching "four born every second", and hopefully realise just how ridiculous she sounds.

And I say that as someone who booked a homebirth for DS2 after a bad hospital VB with DS1.

blueshoes Fri 23-Nov-12 13:49:18

Hierarchy of births from good to worst:

Easy vb
Easy cs
Bad cs
Bad vb

NicknameTaken Fri 23-Nov-12 14:33:46

is the milk supply not hugely delayed with an elc? What would happen if it didn't come in for a couple of days, how would the baby get fed?

I don't know if it delays things, but it's perfectly possible to have a c-section and breastfeed. Isn't it the baby suckling that brings on the milk? I can't tell you exactly when my milk came in, but my post c-section experience was that dd successfully gained weight from birth. And if you've breastfed before, you won't be as clueless as I was, trying to get it started!

YerMaw1989 Fri 23-Nov-12 14:46:23

I've had both VB.
first one about 30 stitches, vontouse,(sp.) heavy bleeding for about 8 weeks.

second time didn't need a single stitch, no assistance, bleeding started to clear up within the first week.

there is no definite with things like that.

loveroflife Fri 23-Nov-12 14:47:31

Thanks Nickname...

Last time was an ecs and I read that this kick starts the milk supply quicker as the body has gone into labour where with an elc no labour starts?

I don't know if this is a load of shite and have a scan in a couple of weeks so will ask then but don't want to struggle with the breast this time so trying to be as fully prepared as possible before I make the decisions of vb or ec.

NicknameTaken Fri 23-Nov-12 14:57:45

I'm no expert, and it's possible that labour does kickstart milk production. But it's not required and even without labour, your milk will come in anyway. And babies are born with a store of fat to tide them over for the first few days. It's quite common for breastfed babies to lose a bit of weight at the very start as they're learning how to feed effectively.

Removal of the placenta kick starts milk supply.

VivaLeBeaver Fri 23-Nov-12 17:39:28

Well I had an emergency section with the best recovery ever. Felt a bit sore the rest of that day and went home 2 days later. Didn't need painkillers by then and felt fine. Was doing housework, and did a 3 mile walk when dd was 5 days old.

My sister had a vaginal birth and missed our wedding when her dd was two weeks old as she couldn't sit down in the car to come to our town.

I've seen hundreds of postnatal women. Some section women are in lots of pain, some are fine. Same goes for women who've had vaginal births.

And by the way I love birth stories, they're fascinating.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 23-Nov-12 18:17:06

thebody

The feeling a failure thing:

Actually, it was pregnancy Yoga, my own ignorance/prejudice, and waaay too little preparation for the possibility and the facts about EMCSs from my NHS antenatal classes

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 23-Nov-12 18:21:13

Oh, and also the fact that I'd endured a 13 hour labour, with an hour of pushing, which made me unduly emotional

I had heard almost no Birth stories at that point. Coming on MN and hearing others experiences actually would have made me feel a lot better about the birth, and related issues such as not bf

Procrastinating Fri 23-Nov-12 18:32:40

I have had 3 cs, they were all lovely and I breastfed easily from the start.
Recovery was no problem, and certainly not painful. Milk letdown was more painful.
I cannot be arsed with people like the OP's 'friend'.

TroublesomeEx Fri 23-Nov-12 20:22:15

I successfully and easily BF after my EMCS and I didn't go into labour with her. She was 5 weeks early but it made no difference.

I didn't have any real pain afterwards. I didn't take the painkillers I was given on discharge because I don't like taking medication I don't need and I didn't even have the 'twinges' I was warned about when the nerves started knitting back together.

I had terrible stomach cramps and wind for a few days following the CS but that was all.

ellee Fri 23-Nov-12 22:51:08

I had two cs, one e, the other not. Recovery on both v essy. Huge box of painkillers in med box that I didn't need.

Milk was def a bit delayed. I managed about 6w on ds but only 10d on dd. But I have pcos as well and I don't think it helped.just couldn't seem to get the milk going, both lost too much weight etc etc. Dd particularly.

But I have two friends who both bf'd v successfully long term after cs. So it is absolutely possible.

LibrarianByDay Fri 23-Nov-12 23:20:50

Everyone is different and our bodies react differently. I found an EMCS a doddle to recover from compared to a VBAC. I guess if the VBAC hadn't caused the damage it did, I might think differently.

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