Quiet carriage - please tell me this woman broke the rules, not me

(83 Posts)
Xiaoxiong Wed 21-Nov-12 21:14:54

Tonight I am raging - I rushed to Waterloo to catch my train home as DS is ill, so I was on the phone telling DH when I would be back and to give him dioralyte until I could get back to breastfeed. As I stepped into the carriage before it had left the station, I was literally saying "ok, so I'll get into [end of line] in an hour, and home by 8.30pm - right, see you, bye, bye now".

As I was saying "see you, bye", literally less than 3 seconds after I stepped onto the train, a woman stood up from two rows away, walked a few steps towards me pointing at the little blue sign on the window and said loudly and officiously, "EXCUSE ME. THIS IS A QUIET CARRIAGE."

I was so shock I said to DH "sorry one sec, someone is saying something to me" and looked at her. She said again slowly and loudly "QUIET. CARRIAGE." and jabbed her finger towards the window, then sat down with a huge huff.

Yes I was on the phone as I stepped into the sacred silence of the quiet carriage. But the train was not yet moving and I was clearly ringing off.

AIBU or has she has broken the Commuting Rules? DH says I am in the wrong as I was on the phone in the quiet carriage but he doesn't commute so he doesn't know the Rules.

NotQuintAtAllOhNo Fri 23-Nov-12 09:50:12

Yes, that is actually one thing I miss about commuting:

Standing there, feeling the motions of the train while letting my body fall in every direction the train decides to jolt, supported by a happy crowd of foul smelling sardines who quite obviously has either been on the lash or not had their breakfast yet.

Bunpea Thu 22-Nov-12 17:46:10

Why didn't you get in a carriage that wasn't a quiet one? Most carriages are not quiet. Most regular commuters know which one is the quiet carriage. I can understand why got told off.

TheCollieDog Thu 22-Nov-12 16:11:30

I think the rules might be slightly different on any trains that are longer than an hour where maybe you can expect quiet and to be able to get some work done.

OP, the Quiet Coach is the Quiet Coach -- it means no loud conversations, mobile phones set to silent and calls taken outside the carriage, and personal stereos at volume levels that don't disturb others. I doubt that that is dependent on the length of the journey.

Although on those crowded SW trains, it seems a little silly to even designate a Quiet Coach. However, if one is designated thus, then it is.

People speaking on mobile phones do tend to speak more loudly than having a quiet conversation with someone sitting next to you.

But what really really gets me about the attitude of the OP and others like her, is that her behaviour required someone else to police it, and to appear rude in doing so. Basically, you should have said sorry & backed out of the coach, or preferably, not behaved in such a way that someone had to point out the "Rules" as you like to call them. And then you think she was the rude person?

< sigh > I travel by public transport only, and I just find people's behaviour inexplicable sometimes.

TheCollieDog Thu 22-Nov-12 16:03:12

You can't even talk in the quiet carriage???

I think it's OK to talk quietly. But that's the thing: IT'S THE QUIET COACH.

Yes, I am shouting. See how annoying it is?

expatinscotland Thu 22-Nov-12 14:44:59

Whatever did we all do before we could all ring each other night and day?

YABU.

BillieKentIsHeavenSent Thu 22-Nov-12 14:31:57

She could have had a bit more patience, but technically you were breaking the 'rule' by talking on your phone in the quiet carriage.

IAmSoFuckingRock Thu 22-Nov-12 13:53:17

this wouldn't happen in Ireland. we just couldn't manage a quiet carriage. it would be all "sure it's only a bit of craic on the way home. what do ya do yerself for a livin'?" grin

MorrisZapp Thu 22-Nov-12 13:50:48

All you had to do was say 'oh, right' and hang up.

Nobody is accusing you of grand felony.

Xiaoxiong Thu 22-Nov-12 13:40:59

hortense now THAT is totally U.

spuddy I think this is where The Rules of No Interaction come from - because there are some scary people out there.

Collie no vestibule on SWT. I accept that to follow the letter of the law I would have had to finish my call outside the carriage in the rain (and then I could have sat next to her soaking wet, bet she would have loved that). But her response was totally disproportionate and broke the "no speaking to others" rule. <maintains outraged and indignant pose of unreasonableness>

I think the rules might be slightly different on any trains that are longer than an hour where maybe you can expect quiet and to be able to get some work done. The trains I'm on are so crushed you are lucky if you can do anything more than check your blackberry.

Floggingmolly Thu 22-Nov-12 13:39:54

I love your definition of The Rules, op. You seem to have conveniently forgotten the one which bans mobiles from quiet carriages?

MorrisZapp Thu 22-Nov-12 13:34:37

You were in the wrong, then you were sarky to her.

There's only one rule in the quiet carriage: all devices switched to silent, and phone conversations to be taken elsewhere.

Maybe that's two rules. But still, hardly difficult to grasp.

Cahooots Thu 22-Nov-12 12:05:57

Where's the BIG MAN when you need him. grin

SooticaTheWitchesCat Thu 22-Nov-12 11:56:23

I have never even herd of a quiet carriage, I don't think they have them on the trains I go on. Not that I go on a train very often.

I don't think you were BU if you were finishing the call. I think I would have just ignored her, she sounds a right miserable one.

marchwillsoonbehere Thu 22-Nov-12 11:41:58

CollieDog Will you marry me (or at least accompany me on all my train journeys)?

marchwillsoonbehere Thu 22-Nov-12 11:39:17

I would be fucked

You can't do that either Alien grin

AlienRefluxLooksLikeSnow Thu 22-Nov-12 11:33:48

You can't even talk in the quiet carriage??? shock I would be fucked.

Orwellian Thu 22-Nov-12 11:17:54

You should have punched her in the schnozzle.

ChrissasMissis Thu 22-Nov-12 11:10:23

Quiet does not mean silent.

YANBU.

Crikey.

Spuddybean Thu 22-Nov-12 10:52:24

it's okay, i'm used to it, a nice middle class woman smashed up my car and threatened to have me killed in Osterly Tescos once, when i told her to stop stealing the sunday supplements on the garage forecourt. I really do bring out the best in people.

Those were the 2 and only times i have ever tried to reprimand anyone. i wont be doing it again. So sad.

Oh dear. Sorry, collie, I found that very funny but I can imagine it was a little annoying at the time.

spuddy - fuck! That's terrifying.

Spuddybean Thu 22-Nov-12 10:45:16

i would have liked to see someone ask the 'yoots' at Thornton Heath to be quiet on the quiet carriage. In fact asking someone not to piss in the corner would have probably got you cut.

Once after major knee surgery (i had a full leg brace and crutches) some teens knocked me over while running thru the carriage - not on purpose - then when i told them off one stamped on my leg. They slapped my husband and threatened to have us killed ('don't you know who i am' erm, some 14 year dick who thinks he's a bad man?) when he came to my aid and a poor french man who tried to intervene got a punch in the face for his samaritanliness - bet he wont do that again!

TheCollieDog Thu 22-Nov-12 10:38:00

I was once in a Quiet Carriage where someone steamed in on their phone, and actually bellowed, 'No, I've just moved into the Quiet Carriage, it's quieter in here, I can hear you better.... yeah, go on, what were you saying?'

I think justifiable homicide would have been in order

TheCollieDog Thu 22-Nov-12 10:37:22

I meant long distance commute twice a week ... grrrr more coffee!

hortensemancini Thu 22-Nov-12 10:37:07

I was once in a Quiet Carriage where someone steamed in on their phone, and actually bellowed, 'No, I've just moved into the Quiet Carriage, it's quieter in here, I can hear you better.... yeah, go on, what were you saying?'

I am a Quiet Carriage policeman in my head

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