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to kill my MiL for telling DD2 that Santa doesn't exist

(122 Posts)
freddiefrog Mon 19-Nov-12 09:39:26

DD2 is 7, she was very firmly in the I Belive camp and I really would have liked it to remain that way for a couple more years.

DD1 (11) got suspicious a couple of years ago, and finally sussed/had it confirmed just after last Christmas, amid dire warnings of no stocking if she blew it for her sister.

The DDs were Skyping with the inlaws last night and the subject of Christmas came up.

MiL said 'oh, you don't still believe in Santa do you <DD2>, you're getting too old for that'. DD asked her what she meant, MiL then told her it was 'all pretend'

I'm ready to kill her

destructogirl Mon 19-Nov-12 15:55:41

We still do the Santa thing. 16yr old DD1 is openly scornful lol.

DS1 is 11 and a bit baffled. I think he doesn't believe anymore, but he seems worried that I might still believe. I think he's wondering whether to break me the bad news.

DD2 is nearly 2 yrs, so I want to keep the magic going.

Shocking that someone would tell a kid there's no Santa sad

Pagwatch Tue 20-Nov-12 12:15:41

Kendodd

What re the other two?

HullyEastergully Tue 20-Nov-12 12:22:54

Pag

2. There is no god
3. Jim'll fix it for you

jeee Tue 20-Nov-12 12:23:47

I think that by year 2 the playground rumour mill leaves no doubt about FC's true identity. Whatever parents may wish to believe.

Although I did have to tell my parents when I was in my mid 20s that actually, I knew that FC wasn't real, and I didn't need a stocking.

And in answer to your original AIBU, murder is probably a bit extreme in this instance.

derekthehamster Tue 20-Nov-12 12:35:21

Both my boys stopped wanting to visit FC when they got into juniors. We have never had THE CONVERSATION and still leave a mince pie and glass of whiskey out even if we've forgotten to eat it until Christmas morning a couple of times They are 13 and 10

They don't believe but it's still fun to have the traditions grin

Still, Bah Humbug to your MIL

Pagwatch Tue 20-Nov-12 12:36:58

grin at jim'll fix it.

Anniegetyourgun Tue 20-Nov-12 12:40:02

"And contrary to the opinions of a few scrooges I have neither been traumatised when I figured out my own aprents had lied to me or upset at the thought of a man with a beard coming in the house to leave me presents."

That was me. I am sure you weren't traumatised etc. I, however, would have found it very hard to take, having been a very literal-minded child, and I can only say that DS1 was upset at the thought of a man with a beard etc, although it didn't bother his brothers. I think he got the "it's really true he does come down your chimney" thing from school, so I guess you could argue that if only I had taught him to believe in and love Santa he wouldn't have been worried. But I would sneer if you did.

I am still fairly literal minded as an adult and actually have quite a problem with the way nearly everyone happily lies to their children, but I have to accept that the majority don't seem to suffer from it in any way! I like how some of the older ones, as reported on this thread, worked out the truth ages ago but like to collude in pretending they believe. That's rather sweet, and if I do have any problem with it, it's my problem. Probably.

LaQueen Tue 20-Nov-12 12:40:06

God, I would detonate like a tactical nuclear missile if my MIL (or any adult) deliberately told my DDs this (they still firmly believe, even at 9 & 8).

Tell your DD, that some adults (like MIL) have been very naughty/stupid/nasty - and that's why they no longer believe in Santa, because Santa has wiped their memories of him, and they no longer get any presents from him, either.

Tell your DD that everyone should feel very sorry for Granny, but that it's her own fault for being so bad earlier in life.

Brycie Tue 20-Nov-12 12:40:12

Ridiculous. We all still believe in Father Christmas and I'm 45. Silly old boot.

Brycie Tue 20-Nov-12 12:41:28

Exactly. We still leave out a mince pie and a carrot. Mine are all teenagers. Bring it on.

Anniegetyourgun Tue 20-Nov-12 12:41:59

For the avoidance of doubt, however, I still think the MIL was an old misery and was probably doing it as a Statement. You have my permission to kill her.

LaQueen Tue 20-Nov-12 12:43:24

Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilllll her.

I'm happy to provide you with a cast-iron alibi OP smile

kinkyfuckery Tue 20-Nov-12 13:11:45

YANBU, I'd be fuming!

kerala Tue 20-Nov-12 14:28:18

I still remember the shock of being told (too early) that the tooth fairy wasnt real...

Floggingmolly Tue 20-Nov-12 16:44:56

What possessed the miserable old Grinch to do that? shock
I'm usually on the side of the much maligned MIL's, but in this case, yes, kill her.

whizmum Tue 20-Nov-12 16:50:45

We told ours that Santa only comes to those who believe in him.

Obviously, Mil does not and Santa does not come to her, therefore she believes he does not exist.

Unfortunately, mine would not deny the existence of Santa at 18 and I had to ban him, from the sheer exhaustion with all the shopping and creeping about etc for years.

elizaregina Tue 20-Nov-12 16:56:49

unbeliveable its awful, i dont even like people even suggesting he might not be real - even putting any thought that he might not be real at all in her mind..
dreadful

Fakebook Tue 20-Nov-12 17:30:24

Oh you'd all hate my dd then.

3 weeks ago we took dd aged 4 to the O2 to watch Madagascar 3. Before the film started there was a snippet of The Rise of the Guardians with Hugh jackman introducing it. Anyway as the snippet was coming to an end dd turned to me and said (very loudly so I could hear over the sound) "Mummy, that's not real is it" as the music came to an end she was still in shouty mode and said "That's not real, because Father Christmas isn't real". The cinema was in silence and I heard a few gasps at the back. I was horrified and just slunk down in my chair whilst DH sat there laughing.

DyeInTheEar Tue 20-Nov-12 17:34:30

Fakebook sounds like a scene from Outnumbered!

TiggyD Tue 20-Nov-12 17:39:12

Tell your DD that MiL is rather grumpy about Santa after getting put on the naughty list for an unspecified but obviously terrible reason.

Abitwobblynow Tue 20-Nov-12 19:13:32

Oh, how could she!

I like this route: Has your MIL ever made mistakes that your DD2 might know about? You could go down the route of Granny getting things wrong sometimes, eg she didn't even know that One Direction are a boy band so she might not know about other things that kids know.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

I don't know, in our house... I'm in my 50s and still believes in the magic (of Christmas). As I say to my strapping teenage kids, you never know... (Bless them, they never let onto their younger siblings if and when disabused)

PenguinBear Tue 20-Nov-12 19:23:45

Have only read the op do don't know this has been said but maybe a few words of granny doesn't believe in magic / everyone who believes will have a visit from santa... The film 'Polar Express' Ia great for a doubter, especially if they can hear the bell wink works great on an 11 yr old doubter who heard the bell and believed for one more year grin

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