To be saddened by teenagers of today

(344 Posts)
dinkybinky Sun 18-Nov-12 16:09:25

Ive just been having a conversation with my niece. Apparently its the norm nowadays to "get with" (kiss)as many boys as possible at teenage parties. Parents even supply alcohol to 14/15 year olds.
Girls like this were called awful names if they behaved in such a way when I was at school, whats changed to make it acceptable?

greeneyed Tue 20-Nov-12 22:13:04

Ha ha me too ran out of boys in my home town smile seriously I am back now 20 years later in the village I grew up in - I wonder if they are all wispering 'bike' when I go in the pub grin

fridgepants Tue 20-Nov-12 22:04:15

I left mine so fast I left skidmarks. I wanted to get somewhere more interesting with more shops and boys and where my gay friends could snog somewhere other than pub toilets so they didn't get beaten up (one thing that's good about teens today: my nephew tells me there are out gay people at his/my old college now).

A few years ago (pre-Facebook) I found a Geocities website someone i went to school with had set up, which had an imaginary wrestling match between me and another unpopular person in the class on it. Yep, really, written by a grown man. At this point I hadn't seen nor spoken to this person for seven years. It made me sad. One of the reasons I stopped using Facebook is that it depressed me to see people cleaving to school/university societies a decade or more later. Keeping the friends is great - I do - but never moving on from it is not.

I can't fathom who would care less about who was or wasn't a 'slag' in 1996.

Alisvolatpropiis Tue 20-Nov-12 21:50:19

Fromesme I agree completely.

FromEsme Tue 20-Nov-12 21:48:47

You know, I really do not understand people who still care about what went on at school. I left my shithole of a home town 12 years ago and have been back about 3 times, so really, I don't even remember 99% of the people I went to school with.

The thought that some of them are still down in the pub moaning about what so and so did a decade ago seems so fucking odd to me. And sad. And pathetic.

fridgepants Tue 20-Nov-12 21:38:49

"there are women who i went to school with 10 years ago who people still call slags from then"

Then they need to grow the fuck up and wash the sand out of their vaginas before they end up with knickers full of pearls.

I hated it as a teenager when people referred to 'male slags' or 'male sluts' as well. Because obviously it was so normal for men to like sex that if they did it to excess we needed to compare them with dirty hooers.

fridgepants Tue 20-Nov-12 21:34:36

Some of my friends are right old kinky slappers and they're yet to be slapped down with the plague for their sins. However, I've had herpes simplex since I was about six, and I'm pretty sure I wasn't snogging any boys then.

I keep telling DP that if he really loved me he'd let me give him a cold sore as a badge of commitment.

Alisvolatpropiis Tue 20-Nov-12 21:30:27

Fridge - I never liked the same boys as my friends. I liked their older brothers instead grin

fridgepants Tue 20-Nov-12 21:28:53

I would have been very happy to explore my sexuality as a teenager - sadly most of the boys I knew were either boring or arseholes so I spent my teen years wondering why I was weird for not fancying who my friends did.

I'm 30 and when I was 15 this happened, and my friend - from a church-going Catholic family - frequently went clubbing at the same age. She lost her virginity at 17 to the same partner she's still with after 13 years.

cory Tue 20-Nov-12 21:25:02

Fishwife1980 Sun 18-Nov-12 20:26:48

"any one who has a teenage daughter 15/16/17 i would be intested to know what you have told you duaghter about this type of thing"

This:

MardyArsedMidlander Tue 20-Nov-12 17:28:41

"And if I ever had had a daughter, I would have warned her to steer well clear of nasty little misogynists who snog girls and then call them slappers"

If dd ever shows signs of basing her self esteem on the opinions of nasty little misogynists like that, then I shall be sorry indeed.

As for ds, I feel confident that if he ever uses expressions like that, dd will kill him. So that's all taken care of.

greeneyed Tue 20-Nov-12 21:14:17

this thread is making me sad now - I miss snogging! Tell your niece to get in there and make the most of it smile

Alisvolatpropiis Tue 20-Nov-12 21:07:31

greeneyed it's funny that dinky should think the "not so good side of town" is where all the "^slappers^" live,because the fee paying schools where I live have a notorious reputation. But suppose all the dregs and poor slappers have led them astray.

Honestly binky,kissing,even sleeping around really isn't the biggest crime in the world.

And whilst you and your charming friend might still think of that woman as "the bike", I would imagine that the people she has in her life now don't. She's probably some bodies wife/parnter and mother by now.

greeneyed Tue 20-Nov-12 20:26:46

dinky really hmm "not so nice part of town" is that where all the dregs, slappers and bikes hang out - have you been resurrected from the 1950s? As I said before I think you've led a sheltered life.

Leonas Tue 20-Nov-12 19:10:16

I am 30 and we did exactly the same at that age. My friends and I didn't have sex with the boys we kissed but there was a whole lot of snogging going on, mostly fuelled by Martini and cider!
I think girls are more likely to have sex at a younger age nowadays but the kissing loads of boys thing is definitely not new

missymoomoomee Tue 20-Nov-12 18:44:41

Its amazing how all of these people in your life have never kissed lots of boys in one night.

Do you maybe think you come over as very judgemental and people don't want to tell you the truth.

FromEsme Tue 20-Nov-12 18:36:30

So you've said.

What's your point? That it is ok to then call girls who do that "slappers"?

dinkybinky Tue 20-Nov-12 18:31:48

Fromesme, I do not think it’s appropriate for 14 year old boys or girls to be kissing (and more) up to 15 different boys/girls on one night.

catgirl1976 Tue 20-Nov-12 18:27:41

Oh.

I thought you didn't mix with the "dregs of society".

It would rather appear that you do.

FromEsme Tue 20-Nov-12 18:26:56

Why are you posting what your friend thinks? If it's not also what you think you need to make that clear.

dinkybinky Tue 20-Nov-12 18:24:49

Catgirl, If you read my post properly, I said that my friends said girls like that were disgusting and must have a bad name or be slaggy

catgirl1976 Tue 20-Nov-12 18:19:58

dinky - just so you know, using words like "slappers" to descrie other women marks you out as being very much the opposite of the "classy", which you seem to so badly aspire to be.

HTH

pointythings Tue 20-Nov-12 18:04:27

dinkybinky what you don't seem to want to understand is that the reputation problem is entirely in the minds of the people who are making the nasty comments about people's reputations. And this will never change until female sexuality is no longer thought of as something dirty. By holding the views you do, you, just like another poster above, are part of the problem. So you can either carry on judging and being a female misogynist, or you can change your attitudes, step away from your judgemental mindset and become a real woman.

Alisvolatpropiis Tue 20-Nov-12 17:52:54

So dinkybinky as well as utterly odd views on what teenage girls should and shouldn't be doing,you make fun of poor people too?

"A girl from the not so nice part of town".

charming

fergoose Tue 20-Nov-12 17:49:20

wow - dinkybinky - I guess you have issues. Snogging a few, several or lots of boys at a party doesn't make me or anyone else a slapper or a bike thanks. We were young, having fun, exploring, etc. Nobody got hurt. I hope my daughter and her mates can enjoy the same sort of fun which we did - looking back it was all quite innocent really. Uncomplicated and fun.

FromEsme Tue 20-Nov-12 17:46:03

dinkybinky what you don't seem to grasp is that some of us couldn't care less if we have a "bad name". If someone is so immature and petty that they judge me by the number of people I've had sex with, great. I will know that they are not my type of person.

My partner certainly isn't bothered, and that's all that matters to me. And I would never be with someone who was bothered.

dinkybinky Tue 20-Nov-12 17:43:10

me and my friends never got called slappers

To your face.

I remember a girl growing up who lived in the not so nice part of town all the boys called her the bike. I met someone from years ago yesterday and he asked me If I remembered the bike, so once you get a bad name it does stay with you whether you believe it or not.

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