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AIBU?

to have told my 11 year old that no he cant have alcohol

61 replies

mamamibbo · 15/11/2012 22:17

after his teacher said she gives her (primary aged) children some now and then because if she doesnt then they will binge drink when they get older Hmm

OP posts:
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Hemlet · 15/11/2012 22:19

Same reason I give my kids heroin.

Only joking. I don't have kids.

But what a stupid reason to give a child booze.

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Feenie · 15/11/2012 22:20

Whaaaaaaaaat?????

Blimey Shock

YABU.

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pointythings · 15/11/2012 22:20

Nope, your absolute personal choice.

My DDs get some on special occasions just as I did as a child, they are told that drunkenness is socially unacceptable and that alcohol is a potentially dangerous drug, but they still get some.

That is my choice, you have made yours and you are absolutely not unreasonable.

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BluelightsAndSirens · 15/11/2012 22:21

No, we used to have children's drinks in adults glasses around 11 and coming from a family of drinkers allowed the odd small glass from 16 but 11?

Tell him his brain is still growing and alcohol kills the cells and makes you look old.

Can you tell I'm not ready to share my precious vino with DC?

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InNeedOfBrandy · 15/11/2012 22:22

Lots of people educate their children by letting them have sipps and watered down wine so alcohol isn't a mystery.

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amazingmumof6 · 15/11/2012 22:33

first of all, if I remember correctly it is illegal to give children alcohol under the age of 18 and I would certainly remind the teacher of this, face-to-face and ask her to think about what she could do to "take back" what she said.

yes, my kids are trying to get a few drops of daddy's beer or wine daddy's as most kids do, just because it's fun and yes if we are not vigilant enough sometimes they win..
but no way they are allowed to drink any alcohol! as they are not allowed to smoke or drive or get married and have kids (in my book anyway...) or miss school for no reason etc..

end of

I hate smoking, but DH does on holidays, so kids got interested.
I told them that if they want to try it I'll have a fag with them on their 18th birthday, no drama, then they can decide...but if I ever catch them until then they will be in big trouble. they said ok, no mention of it since, my oldest is also 11. worth a try?

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NatashaBee · 15/11/2012 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

whois · 15/11/2012 22:36

amazingmumof6 it is not illegal to give your own children under 18 alcohol in your house.

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CassCade · 15/11/2012 22:37

Don't think the idea works. Should you give your child a puff of your fag so they know how disgusting smoking is? Surely it's all about peer pressure when you're a teenager? And the opinions and decisions you have when you are 10, tend to have changed by the time you're 15/16.
Mine insist they will never ever drink or smoke. Mmm, ok, they're 10 and 7 - we'll see.

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amazingmumof6 · 15/11/2012 22:37

I meant all the not allowed stuff under the age of 18! (or whatever the legal age is )

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stargirl1701 · 15/11/2012 22:40

The only legal age in the UK is 5. No alcohol by law to under 5s. After that it is up to parents.

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InNeedOfBrandy · 15/11/2012 22:40

I grew up allowed a wine with lemonade at sunday lunch/christmas dinners. Theres pictures of me about 2 having the froth off of my dads beer. Right till my dad left me I was always allowed the froth. I don't binge drink. I'm not saying I never have a drink and get tipsy but I don't binge drink.

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CassCade · 15/11/2012 22:41

I should have said; I won't let mine drink alcohol, though they have asked to try. I think that their livers are not developed enough to deal with alcohol. Planning to educate them about booze and fags and hope they choose not to do what I did!

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squeakytoy · 15/11/2012 22:41

I was allowed sips of drinks from the age of about 10.. and the occasional glass of wine with soda from 11/12.

Neither of my parents were big drinkers, my dad was teetotal for most of his life and my mum would only have the occasional drink while he was alive.

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blisterpack · 15/11/2012 22:44

My ten year old has friends who are given alcohol at home Shock. It's to do with demystifying it apparently. Wonder at what age they'll crack on with demystifying drugs and sex?

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CassCade · 15/11/2012 22:47

Laughed at blisterpack's demystifying! Crazy, isn't it! All in good time, I say.

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amazingmumof6 · 15/11/2012 22:49

whois & natashabee thanks, I didn't know!
well, I'm not telling them that any time soon, especially that my DS" is 9 and does like the taste of both wine and beer! Grin!

btw I just remembered that I do put wine in a stew or bolognese sauce, coz I was told the alcohol actually evaporates after cooking for a while

to the idea of let them so they will not binge drink I think the jury is still out on that one.
have you seen War of the Roses? (Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner)
the scene she says let the kids eat chocolate/sweets every day so they will not feel deprived and eat loads as soon as they can?
then cut to them being teens and they are fat as hippos! Grin

still a teacher should not be discussing this in a permitting manner, I'd definitely talk to her!

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Dominodonkey · 15/11/2012 23:10

YANBU, and I think it's a strange thing for a teacher to tell a class of that age.

However, I drank a class of snowball at every family party from the age of about 8, my family are not heavy drinkers at all and I rarely drink.

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AThingInYourLife · 15/11/2012 23:18

"However, I drank a class of snowball at every family party from the age of about 8, my family are not heavy drinkers at all and I rarely drink."

Smart - get you drinking the most boaksome of all the booze drinks to "demystify" alcohol. :o

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Startail · 16/11/2012 00:49

Personal choice, my 11y DD is allowed a little bit, but generally doesn't like it.
14yo DD will happily have a small glass of most things.

Our choice to decide that alcohol isn't forbidden, but drinking to excess when they are older is.

DD1 said she was the only one in her PHSE class who had never seen a family member drunk.

I've never seen DH drunk either. He has seen me throwing up, but 21 years ago after wine, very dry salmon and very hot dancing in a full length dress.

I want my DDs to be able to drink responsibly or not at all.

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TacticalWheelbarrow · 16/11/2012 00:55

I come from a Spanish family where drinking is not a major thing. I was given a (small)glass of bucks fizz on xmas morning and a small glass (sherry glass) of red wine every now and then with my meal from aged 10.
To be honest I hated the taste, but I really respect my parents for being so laid back, it taught me that alcohol isn't this magical thing that only adults are allowed. Growing up I didn't see the fascination that my friends had for bacardi breezers and drinking on the sly but now I realize that it was because they were not allowed any by parents.
I do believe that a blanket ban on alcohol encourages kids to drink it on the sly and hide it from their parents.

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TacticalWheelbarrow · 16/11/2012 00:56

But YANBU you have made a decision on how to bring up your kids with regards to alcohol and so have the other kid's parents in the class. You shouldnt be undermined by the teacher! I would not be impressed.

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madbengal · 16/11/2012 01:22

DD is 11 and gets her juice in a wine glass on a special occasion, I can remember my mum giving us very watered down martini and lemonade at Christmas but it's not something I have though of with DD, Im lucky OH is tee total through choice and I only drink wine which is occasional

The teacher shouldnt be telling a class this though as its a personal choice made by the parents LOL the teacher allows it beats the whole but xyz friend is allowed it

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CouthyMowEatingBraiiiiinz · 16/11/2012 01:53

I don't think it is very professional for a teacher to tell a class full of 10yo's her parenting choices.

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amazingmumof6 · 16/11/2012 02:15

I'm sorry, I don't get this - pregnant mums should not drink alcohol to protect baby, but when baby turns into a 5-year old and it's ok to have sips of wine or beer or whatever.

I'm not convinced.

what's wrong with hot chocolate?

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