to be gutted DS asked me to write a New Daddy on his christmas list?

(26 Posts)
BattlingFanjos Mon 12-Nov-12 00:08:43

He's 4.8, doesn't see his dad. Had very little contact for the first 2 years of his life (saw him a handful of times and wasn't introduced as "daddy" as I knew he would go off again) and now nothing due to several reasons. The main one being he is a prick and isn't interested. I have had one relationship in his lifetime and we split 6 months ago.
He knew my ex wasn't his dad, saw him occasionally through the week and on the odd days we all went out on the weekend together. He sometimes asks iwhy we don't see him and we talk about him but it's rare. Doesn't seem to have had a massive negative effect, it's almost like he's not even noticed. We didn't live together and he didn't 'parent' my DS.

Tonight he saw something on the tv and asked if Santa could get him it, I said we'd put it on his ever expanding list. He then said "Will you ask Santa for a new Daddy as well please?"
My heart broke, I felt it, physical pain! Why, why, why?! I'm just sooooo fucking sad that he obviously feels like he is missing out regardless of what I try to do! We talked about it and he decided he was happier it just being me and him (had a play fight, stories and quality time til bedtime so it took his mind away from it).

Guess the question is AIBU to be really sad that my beautiful, bright, confident boy just wants a daddy for christmas and to be feeling like such a shit mum?

BattlingFanjos Wed 14-Nov-12 23:06:56

Ha! Oh dear flow hope she's a better judge of character now lol!

Leonas That's awful sad I hope this sounds right, atleast when they are young they have limited understanding and don't see the bad in people (in most cases). I couldn't imagine hearing those words from my DS. I'm upset just reading your post. I don't think I'll ever stop being angry about people who do this, however much I think I've dealt with it. My DS will not have any contact with his 'father' until if/when he decides he wants to know more and I think he's old enough. Love the fact you're an awsome person haha! I grew up with my dad and am an awesome person despite it lol! It's very overrated!

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