to panic about childcare?

[rpickett]

I'm getting myself worked up, I know I am but I'm just so sodding stressed with it all.
I am due with DC3 in 5.5weeks, my mum has agreed to watch DC's whilst I am in hospital having DC3 but I'm panicking incase she changes her mind at the last minute, which may sound unreasonable BUT... When I was pregnant with DC2 she wanted to be at the birth which was fine, but I when I had a false labour at 35weeks I called her to say I was going into hospital and my aunt was taking me in and would stay until she arrived (my mum was 120miles away at this time) to which my mum threw a tantrum and refused to come, luckily I didn't have DC2 then and she did attend the birth at a later date.

Now it's my DN's 1st birthday party a week before my due date and my dads birthday on my due date, If I happen to go into labour on the weekend (either) I just know that they will take priority and my mum will cancel on me, my sister has told me that I should arrange a c-section or inducment before her sons birthday party cos it's not fair to make my mum miss it (sister is the favorite and it has always been want she says goes with my mum), to which I have told her to sod off and the baby will come when she wants to.

I have no friends in the area and no other family, If I go into labour and it is an inconvince to my mum I am really stuck on who will look after my DC's, DH could stay home but I am not good with pain and don't think I could cope without him , and I don't really see why he should miss out on the birth of his daughter.
I have tried several nanny agencies and posting ads but no-one can say they can do it as I don't know when I am going to obviously go into labour.

AIBU to panic? I really don't know what I am going to do.

[Tori27]

I would call around local childminders who can do overnights and try to organise something with them. DC will probably need to spend some time with childminder dor a few days beforehand so they feel happy but definitely understand you want DH there.

Otherwise I think I'd raise my worries with my mum - but I'm quite forward and it's easy to say as a by-stander.

Where do you live? Definitely need to make friends if family is that bad. xxx

[autodidact]

Do your kids go to school/nursery? Ask their best friend's parents, if so?

[rpickett]

I have tried several childminders in my area (well the good ones) and got told they don't know if they'd be able to help as it depends when I go into labour (fair enough, but it doesn't help me).
I have tried to speak to my mum but she is a very difficult person, her response was she doesn't want to discuss anything until I'm at least 35 weeks as I'm wasting her time and my breath, very difficult relationship background to explain but she blows hot and cold at the turn of the weather.
Unfortunatly I'm a stay at home mum with my DC's (2yrs and 1yr) so have no contacts / friends, did try parent/toddler groups but find it hard to talk to people as I am socially awkward.