My dd's teacher gave her stuff she's allergic to

[texasrose]

Hi,
I have a 4yo dd who is allergic to wheat, eggs, soya and nuts. She's not anaphylactic (how to spell??!!) but has nasty skin reacions and also severe excema. We have fully briefed her school on the allergies and what she can/can't have.

Today it was a child's birthday in her class and unbelievably the teacher gave dd some cake! It was only when I picked her up from the childminders that it all came out she was given a slice of cake just before the childmider picked her up at lunchtime (she only does a half ay ATM) and by the time they got home her face was all red and swollen. THe childminder was all worried but dd didn't tell her about the cake until I got there.

I phoned the school but the teachers were busy. By the time they phoned back I was out so my mum took a message in which the teachers said it shouldn't have happened but didn't exactly say sorry or admit responsibility either.

Dh is hopping mad over this but says it's up to me how I handle it. the thing is I don't really know if there's anything i can/sholud say. She goes to a good school and she's thriving there but they don't seem v. allergy/excema aware generally. Any advice? thank you!

[texasrose]

sorry - just feel compelled to say sorry for the incoherence of some of my sentences there! I blame half-term-itis

[WitchICouldGiveUpWork]

I think they need a severe warnign shot over the bows-how fortunate you rdd isn't anaphylactic but had she been the consequences could have been dire.

Damned irresponsible and negligent I say.

[MorticiaRed]

Did you tell the office or the teacher in question about your DD's allergy? Is there a chance the message did not get passed on. I'm not trying to excuse what happened. I'm sure the teacher is devastated. Hope DD is okay now.

[ChicPea]

My DS is allergic to eggs, humous, kiwi, fish and when I sent him to a small nursery I put it in writing that this was the case. I gave them a bottle of piriton to give if he had touched eggs while baking bread by accident or if one of the other children touched him before washing their hands. They respectfully observed this. Now he is at the nursery at school they wanted a fully detailed letter and an unopened bottle of Piriton in case he touches egg. They do have birthday cakes from time to time and they asked me if they should stop the egg containing ones and I felt that they should still go ahead as I didn't want to deprive the other children from a treat but that they should make sure that the other children don't touch him. I have given them biscuits so that when the other children have cake, he can have a safe biscuit. I would really write a strong letter to the school to emphasise how serious the allergies are and that they are obliged to give a duty of care while your dd is in their care.

[texasrose]

hi, yes, I wrote a letter to the teavhers in the foundation stage (nursery) saying exactly what dd is allergic to and specifically saying that we didn't want her to be given any food until we (dh and I) had been consulted first.

It was the parents' evening lsat night and I talked with the head for a good 20 mins about dd's allergies, and she made nots of what was said...so yes the school certainly know (in theory).

I just don't feel v. confident leaving dd there if the teachers can make that kind of mistake.

An i being OTT?

[possumhead]

I would write a letter for the attention of the school nurse asking that she ensure that the school staff have training in awarness of allegies.
You could also ask for a care plan to be written, therefore all staff will definately have an awareness of the situation.

[mamamaaargh]

When I taught, if a child had allergies, it was best if the teacher & head were made aware by the parents either in person or in a clearly worded letter - ideally both (that way you know you have explained things and you have proof that you informed them). This was then shared with the teaching assistants, lunchtime staff & other teachers in a staff meeting so that everyone was aware of the situation.

I would talk with the teacher again and reiterate the nature of your dc's allergies, reactions & treatment. After this incident, I'm sure it won't happen again. I would also remind your daughter about not eating cake etc - I realise it is very hard for a 4 year old to understand, remember and then resist treats when everyone else is having some. I like the idea of providing a 'safe' biscuit or alternative for her in future. I hope she is ok now...

[threebob]

Sounds like your daughter knew she shouldn't have had some if she didn't let on even whilst the childminder was being worried about her. But she is only 4.

I just don't think they should allow children to bring stuff in. That would totally solve the problem for you, your dd, the teacher and the other parents.

[HauntedsandCastle]

I have noticed that alot of primary schools and kindy's here don;t allow children to take in food, and it's for this reason exactly!

Maybe your dd's school should employ these tactics if the teacher can't be trusted to remember your dd's allergies. I am just thankful for you that she isn't anaphylactic, could have been a whole different story.

Of course there is something you can say, you had informed the school of your dd's allergies and they should not have let her have the cake!

[KTeepee]

In our school children do bring treats in when it is their birthdays - and I personally think this should be allowed. BUT children with allergies are not allowed to take any of the treats, regardless of what the ingredients are. The parents of those children provide the teacher with a bag of suitable alternatives which their children are given when other treats are doled out. This seems to work well. For those children at risk of anaphylactic shock, there is a poster of each child with their photo and detals of what to do, both in the childs classroom and the main office.

I do think it is up to you to start teaching your child not to eat any food approved by you. I have a friend who's son gets severe excema if he eats dairy. From an early age he has been able to appreciate that he can't eat these things, make appropriate choices for school dinner, refuse treats, etc. and doesn't feel that he is missing out.

[misdee]

my view, as a mother of 3 children with allergies. strong word with the school, give the teacher a list of allergies, make sure one in the kitchen as well if she has school dinners.

give the teacher a bag of treats that dd is allowed (i offered to provide a bumper pack of cadburys buttons, but her teacher has provided it this year).

and drum it into dd as well. dd knew from a very young age what to avoid. my dd2 is 4 and states 'N cant have that mummy, shes lergic'

[Smithagain]

It does sound as if they are not very allergy aware, since it should have been a no-brainer not to give your DD cake. Is it worth having a chat with the teacher to see if you can help them access some training? The Anaphylaxis Campaign might have some suitable resources on their website. Even though she doesn't have anaphylaxis, the issues are similar.

Also, do you need to work on your DD's ability to say no? I know she is only four but my DD is the same age (was 4 in July) and has proved quite conscientious about saying that she mustn't have nuts.

I like the idea of giving the teacher a bag of "safe" treats. We do that at home, but hadn't occured to me to extend it to school.

Hope you can have a good conversation with them. It's scary if you don't think the school environment is safe for them.

[rustycreakingdoorbear]

I would first check with the school exactly what happened: was it a supply teacher? or a TA? did she give the cake, or did another child pass it on? Then see the head,and ask them to ensure that their procedures wrt food are clearly understood by all staff, including supply and TA's- at our school we have pictures of ch with allergies in the register,as well as the staff room, so that supply staff know.
We have a strict medicine policy, but in a recent case it wasn't carried out & the wrong child got some medicine, because the person giving it didn't ask her name, but 'Was it you who brought in the medicine?' she said yes, because she had come with her friend to the office to give it in.
Luckily it was only an over the counter medicine & there were no ill effects, but it could have been really serious, esp if she'd had an allergy.
We had a thorough review of the whole policy, with every member of staff re signing the rules and we now have a large sign telling staff to check the name, dose ,time etc
Ironically, we shouldn't even have been giving the medicine, as her mum hadn't signed the form, but when she rang & said could we,the secretary said yes as a favour & she could sign the form when she picked up her daughter.

[texasrose]

HI, no, it wasn't a TA or supply teacher, it was the same teacher who's looked after dd since January, and to whom I addressed a very clear letter outlining her allergies.

I do worry that they just don't take it seriously enough. When I spoke to head on Thursday she said all the right hings, was suitably concerned etc but I suspect that my dd's teachers see me as an overprotective neurotic parent who is making a mountain out of a molehill. (during one meeting the teacher said quite condescendinly, 'it's not as if it's life-threatening, is it?' - which makes me think tey'd only take it seriously if they thought it were life threatening. as it is the excema plays havoc with dd's sleep, eating, emotions etc etc - it is a big deal!) That doesn't make me feel too confident about leaving dd with them, altho in every other area the school is brilliant for dd.

Sorry to vent my spleen but I do feel quite angry about this. Thank you for letting me!

[misdee]

'it's not as if it's life-threatening, is it?'

a mild allergy can become life threatening FFS. arrrrgh.

dd1 has always been sensitive to colourings, tarttrazine being the main one. over the summer, she started reacted to everything. on day she had an ice lolly, and her eyes started streaming, her lips swelled, and she started wheezing slightly.

give them hell!!!

[rustycreakingdoorbear]

Sounds like they really do need to review their policies. Can you find out who is the governor responsible for health & safety (the school should give you their name)& contact them personally; asking how they make sure that all relevant medical information is given to staff, and how they ensure that the staff realise what this means in practice?

[Smithagain]

With regard to "it's not as if it's life threatening".

Just for comparison, my DD is not even diagnosed as allergic to nuts - but my DH is seriously allergic and we have asked the school to ensure that she does not eat any because we are excluding nuts from her diet for the time being.

They have been entirely happy with our request for special diet etc and have treated her as cautionsly as if she had been diagnosed. For eg when the class baked bread last week, the teacher was unsure about the ingredients ("may contain ...") and did not let her eat it until she had checked with me at the end of the day.

And of course you could point out to them that they haven't really got a clue whether it's life threatening or not. My DH ate nuts as a child with only mild allergic symptoms - but he had an anaphylactic reaction at 17 which was definitely "life threatening".

I'm sure you know all this, but just to reassure you that you are not being unreasonable and the school do sound as if they need educating.

[texasrose]

Hi again,

I think I've decided that I am going to pop round to the school at the end of the school day after half term to talk to the teachers, and just guage (how to spell???) if they do see this as a serious issue or not. I get the feeling they see me as an overfussy mother hen.

I am torn between not wanting to make things unnceesarily difficult for the teachers (I like them and they are doing a great job with dd) but also wanting to be 100% clear that they understand the importance of supporting us as we avoid the allergens...what do you think? Any advice as to how to approach the teachers? I know that different people would handle this differently...I am quite a non-confrontational person so the thought of challenging the teachers scares me!

I also want dd to respect the teachers so I don't want to say anything that would make her any less respectful/good at school. As I've thought about it I've realised that it is dd's respect and desire to please that made her eat the cake - she knew (I'm quite sure) she shouldn't but when you're 4 it's very hard to say no to anything a teacher asks you to do...she loves being the 'helper' and her behaviour at school is impeccable...do you see what I mean? So it's a case of teaching her to say no but in a respectful and nice way.

BTW I made dh a dd-friendly birthday cake and it was fab!!! Really pleased with it. Both dcs wolfed it down!

[zachanhar]

hello, my ds has food allergies that give him eczema just like your dd and i am a primary school teacher so.... your child's teacher screwed up big time and she knows it. the school are trying to play it down as they know you are entitled to a massive wobbler. i would defo go and see the teacher and start off by thanking her for all the hard work she has put in with your child and say how you are very happy generally with everything. then bring up the incident with the cake and say you are still rather concerned about it as no one seems to be taking the incident seriously. ask her if any measures have been taken to ensure a mistake like this could not happen again. be kind and gentle with her as she will be pretty scared of you!! you really dont need to be confrontational. yet.

[texasrose]

thanks NurseyJo!

The little girl you talked abut sounds v. much like my dd - once we wentto my in-laws' house and mt FIL gave her a kiss on the cheek. Within less than a minute the whole side of her face was red, swollen and nettle-rashy. The reason was that my FIL had had an egg sandwich an hour previously and traces were still on his lips.

hmmmmmmmmmm....................

[TwigTwoolett]

I think I would go BALLISTIC