Peanut allergy, starting school and free school meals

[MrsWeasleyWannaBe]

My dd is 4.5 and starts school in a couple of weeks. She's allergic to peanuts and has epipens and piriton with her all the time. She was diagnosed with the allergy after she reacted to a peanut butter sandwich two years ago. She's never had a reaction since and we've never had to use the epipen so far.
She is re-tested annually at the hospital but unfortunately they had to cancel the clinic for the most recent test and it's likely the new appointment will be after she has started school. In the meantime we are having to decide whether she should have school meals or a packed lunch.
School meals won't have nuts as an ingredient but apparently they can't guarantee they will be free from traces of nuts. My first thought was that dd should therefore have a packed lunch from home, but then she could be sitting next to kids who have peanut containing food in their lunchbox and although she knows the rules, at 4.5 I couldn't be sure she wouldn't merrily swap/share food with another child. So now I'm thinking that she might be safer with the school meals - she's never reacted to anything that has only been a 'trace' but of course she may not have been exposed to a trace either!
I would love to hear thoughts from other parents on this and also any advice in general on starting school with an allergy. I've spoken with the school already about her epipens and they have good systems by the sounds of things for managing them.
Any thoughts and advice much appreciated!

[noblegiraffe]

What do other children with allergies at school do? Does the school allow children to bring in nut-containing food? Some schools have a nut ban so swapping sandwiches wouldn't be an issue - although at 4.5 your child is old enough to know that they shouldn't be doing this and starting to take some responsibility for their allergy themselves.

[MrsWeasleyWannaBe]

It's a new school, only opened last year so there aren't many children yet but I will ask about other children, that's a good point. DD is very good about checking what she can eat, but I don't think at 4 it is fair to rely on this. I could see her being tempted in to sharing a cereal bar or similar. The school have offered to ask other parents not to bring nuts into school but I think this might lead to a false sense of security?

[auntpetunia]

Have you told school about her allergies? You need a meeting with senco caterers and school nurse to draw up a care plan. If you've not done this already call school tomorrow or better still email and get the ball rolling before they go back.

In my school we've had no peanuts/nuts allowed on building including staff snickers bars! All parents notified and asked to be considerate , our caterers changed some menu options, no satay chicken etc and the child had school meals for the whole time in our school.

[pashmina696]

My DS has severe tree nut, sesame and egg allergies, there were other kids already at the school with similar allergies, they have no nuts on site, and have taken sesame off the menu now, and they are very good at helping him to avoid egg. I had a meeting with the school, council and catering prior to him starting lunches explaining his allergies, types of reaction to expect and going through his emergency plan. He prefers a hot meal and i figured it was better he had school meals than sit with packed lunch kids who may have the odd stray houmous sandwich etc

[DoItTooJulia]

The school should be able to put in place procedures to minimise the risk to your dc.

However, not the same, BUT, my ds is veggie. They told him fish fingers, fish pie and other fishy dishes were veggie, even though they have been told he doesn't eat fish. So ds is on packed lunches. And you're right, difficult for them to speak up when they are 4.

I'd go down the packed lunch route, even though the school should be able to manage a nut free environment. (Our school is totally nut free).