Not outgrown allergy by school age....is there still hope?!

[rascals]

Hi,
Have posted on mumsnet before but not for long time.I was wondering re. my ds1 allergy to milk,which he has had since 3 wks. old.
We were always told by consultant,dietician etc. that school age seemed to be the time when a lot of children 'outgrow' allergies & that if they haven't by then, then there is less chance of them outgrowing allergy though it is still possible.
My ds1 has reached school age(he's now 5.5) & is still very allergic to milk & dairy products,though can take milk in well cooked format,i.e cakes,bisc.,but not sauces,yogurt,cheese etc.
He did have allergy also to fish,soya,eggs & wheat,but had ougrown these by age 3.
Does anyone have any experience of their child outgrowing their allergy later than school starting age.
I notice that ds immune system is definately getting stronger all the time & he is much better re. foods than he was in his toddler years.
I guess I am just wondering if there is still every chance he could no longer be allergic at some point.He doesn't miss out a lot(& has an alternative non-dairy food for most dairy propducts ,but I think he(& me)have become more aware lately since he began school,with him being in school dining hall eating lunch with classmates,birthday parties,where there's some foods he can't have & all his classmates going to each others houses for tea etc.
Anybody any info./experience re.this,it would be much appreciated,Thanks(Sorry it's a long posting)

[foxinsocks]

ooh a milk allergy is a pain isn't it! It's in so much stuff.

I can't help you specifically with milk as dd outgrew that at 2 however, she started school with her egg allergy. I suspected her immune system was getting stronger and I also thought that she was probably outgrowing it. We still haven't had it officially confirmed but over the summer holidays, I tried her with cooked egg and also rubbed some raw egg white onto her arm and she didn't have a reaction (normally she would react straight away). She was 6 when this happened.

I would imagine that the fact that he can tolerate a little bit and that you feel he is getting stronger may be positive signs but I really am not medically experienced in this area.

[brimfull]

My dd outgrew her egg allergy at 8 yrs.I think there is still hope for your ds ,especially as he can have well cooked milk.That's how my dd started to outgrow it.My ds is allergic to tree nuts and was allergic to eggs.He has been tested and can now have cooked egg! This change happened at 3.5yrs
Hope this gives you some hope albeit not a milk allergy.

[ke127106uk]

check out our new site with particular regard to school food and allergic kids.

www.freewebs.com/allergynetwork

Ke.

[livelife]

Hi rascals, my ds is 11 & is milk allergic. he was also allergic to soya, nuts, egg and honey. soya went at 3, nuts at 6, egg at 8, honey last year. skin prick for milk was 16mm when he was 2. he has had 2 anaphylactic reactions to it. challenge at 8 had to be stopped after drop in mouth because of blistering and hives but there was an 11yr boy who was fine whereas at 10 he wasn't. my ds skin prick last year was 7mm but is now 3! so we are waiting for another challenge. exciting but not sure i can believe it. But - don't give up it is possible to outgrow allergy at any age.

[onehappymummy]

Cool that really gives me hope. My ds has been diagnosed with peanut allergy at 2. Nothing compared to you but still a mind blowing shock!!
How the hell did you cope with it all?

[livelife]

Morning! coped with ds allergies, eczema and asthma by going into overdrive at expense of everything else sadly. ds is only alive cos of me (its long story) but my marriage died. he was at utterly severe end of allergies but he is now fit, healthy and happy with no sign of there ever having been anything wrong. So yes don't let your ds allergy get you down, just learn how to handle it sensibly. you sound sensible not a panicker so you'll do just fine. i'm really happy to chat about all your worries or give practical tips. all my ds problems are under control and he plays rugby etc. have written a book about having a child with food allergy for parents by parents which will be printed early next year. V exciting for me!

[onehappymummy]

Fantastic news about the book! Good on you! Sorry to hear about the rest of it though. Has given me a reality check though as you only think it's happening to you and that your ds isn't going to live a 'normal' life!
Can you say online what the book will be called and your author name or is that 'plugging' against mumsnet rules? I'll keep an eye out for it ready to buy it. And in the mean time thank you for your kind offer of advice. I think it's the initial shock of the first allergic reaction that sends you off into sheer panic but I am beginning to come to terms with it now.

[onehappymummy]

Hi livelife
Couple things I have concerns over managing are the trips out with the unorganised lunch box. How do you manage the restaurant/take away? It's not just the ingredients is it, it's contamination fear too. What type of questions should I be asking to ensure everything he would eat outside the home is nut free?
I'm taking the plunge and going back to work in November and I'm scared about the fact of putting him into nursery even though they will be aware of his allergy. Is it just a case of me letting go?
Also, how and when do I start to explain he is slightly 'different' without making him different if that makes sense. He's only 2 but I know time will fly!!
Thanks for your time.

[livelife]

Not sure bout 'plugging it' rules but you can be sure once its out i'll be telling every1!!! As far as letting go is concerned it is a nightmare at such a young age. I didn't need nursery but school was bad enough, big panics and i went in at lunchtime to sit with him! You need to be absolutely sure you trust the nursery - if you have doubts choose another. will you provide food or they? He must have 1 to 1 attention at lunchtime at this young age. hopefully nobody would have anything with nuts in as they are so young. cross-contamination issues are a worry but it is actually a very small risk that anything your ds is accidentally given from another child would contain nuts. milk, egg allergy is different as they are in lots of common foods at this age. as ds gets older that nut risk grows as the range of foods grows. the staff must have epipen training. I personally had to not worry about nut risk because milk and egg were harder to avoid. put in context there will be no peanuts at nursery. he will be fine honestly.
Lunch box issue - is that picnic for your family that you mean? i'm cross so many companies put 'may contain' on to cover their backs because it restricts unneccessarily. such a dilemma. kinnerton kids products are nut free, they made a special effort to seperate their production belts, so we should all buy from them as a thank you.

[onehappymummy]

Thanks for that! I feel I want to trust the nursery but at the moment as this is all so new I don't feel I can trust anyone but myself. I do unfortunately have to go back to work but I understand your point and I will be going back to talk more to them about it and ensure they understand how important this is to my ds life!

Sorry when I talked about lunch boxes I meant that if the dreaded happened and I forgot his lunch box on a day out and had to rely on restaurant or cafe food how I would manage this and what questions i should be asking the staff other than 'does it contain nuts!!'

Thanks ever so much for your time LiveLife

[rascals]

Thanks all for your messages & info.
Livelife, I too will be keeping an eye out for your book.
Also just to say to onehappymummy,re.the restaurants/takeaways & your ds having peanut allergy:
I know Macdonalds get a lot of bad press re. junk food etc.,but with ds1 milk allergy, over time we have taken him there quite a few times.We have never come across a member of staff who wasn't helpful with allergy situation,if they don't know they have gone & found out for us & have made up meals without certain ingredients for ds1.Also at one time they had this great booklet on their counter display(free,you could just help yourself to)and in it was every single food they sold in their restaurants & wether it contained milk/nuts/ wheat/soya/egg etc.Haven't looked at it for while as we know now what ds1 can/can't have,but I'm sure they still have it.
I'm probably stating the obvious here & I do apologise if I am ,but another thing in restaurants etc,is we always check what type of oil they fry in,as we were under the impression there is a chance peanut oil could be used.We have never come across one yet that does use peanut oil & I think most restaurants etc. don't but we feel better to check!
One last thing about the nurseries,totally agree with livelife,IF in doubt don't use that one.I think when I was looking for nursery for ds1 I phoned/visited at least 10 before I decided on one for him.I asked them all questions & any that seemed remotely vague re. epipens,allergies ,I didn't go near!I went with the nursery that I felt most reassured with ,they had procedures in place & they always erred on side of caution with ds1 if they were in any doubt,instead of just taking a chance.
HTH

[onehappymummy]

Thanks rascals - you all don't know how more positive this is making me feel. I don't want to alienate my ds so to me mummy has to have the confidence and understanding to deal with it before he really begins to understand. I think I'm heading that way! Cheers

[livelife]

hi 1happymummy, really glad you are beginning to feel more confident - you will more and more over time. there will be some unexpected panics but generally you will become more comfortable with the whole situation. If you forget the lunchbox when you go out you can get your ds some chips and beans if he eats these as they seem to be safest. I'd avoid anything in breadcrumbs. I used to ask for plain grilled chicken breast, chips and peas. most places accomodated well. we have however walked out of restaurants if they are awkward. my ds is more important than my embarrassment at doing that
I agree with rascals about mcdonalds actually - we have been all over the world (little exaggeration!) with ds and his allergies and they are top trumps in all countries - although the ingredients differ so be aware of that.
I really think you'll do this well & your ds will be fine.

[onehappymummy]

Hi all

Just want to throw around some thoughts and questions. Hope you don't mind. And I hope it makes sense!!
Been nursery hunting today and I believe I've found a place that I could feel comfortable with. They are prepared to sit down with me and go through the nursery menu to see if there are suitable meals for my ds. Still nervous about the ingredients for each meal though as they will need to be scutinised.
The thought of home cooked food to a mum who has a child with no allergies must seem like heaven but it is actually more of a nightmare to think about. Do you think there is more chance of exposure with home cooking at nursery than say another nursery who bought in ready prepared food that they say the manufacturer guarentees as nut free?(I know of one nursery who says this but I didn't get a good vibe to the staff!!)Should my priority be the food or the staff???!!!
Or do I go down the route of childminders where I can supply the food myself? I'm not learning to let go though if I choose this route am I?

[Heartmum2Jamie]

Reading this thread has given me some real hope for ds2. He is allergic to milk, eggs, nuts & wheat. It is a worry, but it is heartening to hear of children outgrowing allergies, especially nuts & wheat, my main concerns.

As far as nursery or pre-school goes, we have made a joint decision not to send ds2. We are lucky that I am a SAHM and can keep him home with me. He is on a fair bit of medication, food/allergy related and just don't need the hassle on top of his other health problems. The nursery that he was due to attend is attached to the school my ds1 attends and ds1 went to the nursery, so I know that thay don't cater for allergic children. Ds1 was always given buttered toast, biscuits or fruit as a snack, no of which ds2 can eat or will touch, lol! Then there is the egg box stuff they make and cring home. It's my worst nightmare!

For eating out, we mainly take food with us, dietary specials bread, some spread and ham or chichen if we know there won't be something suitable for him. Most places are happy to check ingredients lists of the food they use and I have to agree that Macdonalds are fab and is one of the safest places we can take ds2 to for a meal, he can have a burger patty, the fries and the sauce (the use heinz) and he's as happy as Larry! We too have also had an experience of a place being funny. We asked for roast beef, but what they didn't tell us was that it has been sitting in gravy and they tryed to scrap it off, was not very happy I can assure you. We did get his meal for free, good thing as he hardly touched it!

As for your ds 1happymummy, my ds2 is 2.3 years and is just becoming aware that he is not eating the same things as the rest of us. We have just come back from our hols in somerset and ds was distraught the one day because he asked for cheese and was told no and then he saw some people eating icecream and wantwed one and had to be told no again. It really was heartbreaking I have no advice but would be interested in any replies you get.

[livelife]

I would go with good staff and home cooked food tbh. Once the weekly menu is devised and you've checked it you will only need to know about any changes. You will come to relax and trust them, it'll just take time, i promise.