I gave my daughter up and we have an open relationship. That is what I wanted, and I loved everything about it. The adoptive family has been fantastic and it wasn't until I slowly stopped communicating, sending letters, etc...that they also stopped. Which was fine with me.
My daughter's aunt is MY aunt's best friend. That is how we arranged the adoption. My aunt has watched my child grow up.
This summer, the Aunts were travelling together, and I had a wonderful visit with them. She talked about my DD and how she is doing, etc. We talked about her birth... I found out that she has Aspergers and a mild case of curvature of the spine. None of my other 4 children do! I reached out to her fathers side of the family to see if they had any medical information I could pass on. And they also don't have anyone in their family that has been diagnosed.
My dad was visiting with his sister and the aunt, and was told DD graduation is coming up. My dad said he wanted to go.
SOO... put me on the spot when they told me.
I know I am risking some of you mad...
I didn't bond with her when I was pregnant with her. Nor did I want to keep in contact with her.
I really don't want to go. Honestly, it's her special day and she should spend it with those that have raised her and watched her grow. To ME, it isn't the right time to go and meet her.
THEN, to boot... I have facebooked (yes we talk) and have asked a few times about when is her grad. I have asked her aunt. (they all live far away from me) and I need to know so I can plan.
I go online and check out her school. I found out the grad dates, and when things are going on.
Now, I feel my gut feeling was right. I'm not really wanted/expected to be there for her grad.
I don't want to pull my 2 other children out of school for the last 2 weeks of school to go either.
I know she wants to learn about her "blood" as she talks to my aunt.
She also is friends on facebook with her older brothers too, and their g/f's.
I'm sorry. Am I wrong to not want to go? Would you understand as the adopted child?
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5 replies
Mother2many · 28/02/2013 19:26
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