Fed up

[funnychic]

Fed up of waiting for the phone to ring and it doesn't! I know I'm being a bit ridiculous as I've only been approved 10 weeks but it feels like years! From start to finish to date I've been in the process 19 months which I know is nothing compared to other people but knowing I am approved I just want to start being a mother. I think I'm sensitive this week as we have had the worst worst ever week at work which most of you will have seen in the National press/tv. Sorry for moaning on here I'm just having my very own pity party.

[Devora]

I really sympathise - it's such a hard time. Up till approval it's all kind of mapped out, and you know what's going on, and then suddenly you feel at the mercy of the universe. It's really tough not knowing what you will be doing at Christmas, or next spring, or summer... Just have faith that it will be worth the wait!

Huge sympathies about the work situation, too. I think I can guess what that's about. Take care of yourself - you're having a hugely stressful time, but it will get better.

[Lilka]

I can only echo Devora - it is a hard time, unlike approval stage there is no timeline and no end in sight, you aren't doing much, you have little control, and the wait drags on and on. And it can be really depressing and frustrating and tiring

Try and keep in your mind that this does have an end. You don't know what that date is...but it will happen. Maybe I'm odd, but i though of it like...it's already mapped out, the dates are set (when I find out, when DC moves in), the fates know it all, but I don't. But it's going to happen for certain

You will find your LO. Probably born already (That was a funny thought for me, I spent days thinking 'oh, my child is probably in school today...wonder what they are doing?). But maybe your little one is not free for adoption yet, and that's why your wait is longer than for others. When she is ready to be adopted, you will be right there waiting for her :)

Are you subscribed to BMP/CWW/ on the national register? Made a profile or booked on an exchange day? I don't know what your LA's policy is like on that, but it may help you feel more pro-active/in control?

Much sympathy. Be kind to yourself

[Italiangreyhound]

funnychic thinking of you. Hope you can find some fun things to do with the time you have on your hands. Keep a journal, paint some pictures, take up jogging, whatever! When your new one comes you will not have that much time to spare (I expect) and so may appreciate some 'me' time now. YES, I know it doesn't feel like it.

Huge hugs.

[LocoParentis]

i'm sorry funnychic. I'm not at that stage yet so can only imagine how frustrating it is.

At thirteen weeks don't you have to get added to the national database?

Very easy to say, but a lot harder to do. why don't you draw up a list of things you love doing that you won't be able to do for ages once your dc arrives. Lovely meal out, spa day etc. It might keep you occupied a little bit

[Ladyofthehouse]

Sorry to hear you're getting frustrated! I can only echo all the great advice you've already been given. You will get the call!

We waited 6 weeks and then our SW called one evening and that was it since then - quite a whirlwind!

Fate is a funny thing! our panel date for approval got delayed by a month and I was so frustrated at the time but if we had been approved that early on we might not have been matched to our little one's.

Probably not much comfort to you so enjoy making plans for all the jobs or things you want to do beforehand!!

[funnychic]

Thanks everyone, I know your right, patience is a virtue I'm obviously not that virtuous!! At least I am laughing a bit today. xx

[WendyGx]

Hi funnychic
I can echo your frustrations and I'm pleased you posted this - its made me feel normal! We were approved at the start of May, but had to put off the family finding until I had some treatment (I have leukemia) I am waiting for my consultant to send the report which we hope will confirm I am fit enough for the family finding. Frustration in waiting is painful. Our adoption plans kept me strong through the treatment - as a goal (ifswim).
Oh dear, I have hijacked - but just again a thanks for posting this as I now feel better for being so frustrated. Pleased to hear you're feeling brighter.
Hope that call comes soon for you!

[funnychic]

Hi Wendy hope your feeling ok after your treatment, you have made me feel quite bad for moaning now! lol, blimey I'm only waiting for a call, I don't have to endure having leukemia. Anyway I really hope your get the report you are waiting for and can start your journey towards having a little one running around. xx

[WendyGx]

Oh no, I'm so sorry I didn't think I was comparing - I thought we we're in the same boat - waiting!
Thanks for other message - its a positive that I'm not yet resorting to stalking! Ha ha!