I was adopted when I was 18 months. I always new the truth but at the age of 14 I got in contact with my borth family (behind my parents back). My birth mother told my mum and we met up.
At 14 I thought it was great as they seemed alot more layed back than my parents. I met them on a regular basis until I fell pregnant when I was 19 with with my DS now (8). When I fell pregnant for reasons I don't really understand my self I cut all ties with my birth family.
Last year I got back in contact with them on a small level via facebook. I feel like I have to keep them at a distance. My feeling are very mixed up about it.
Anyhow my Bio mother has asked me the other night if I would send her a up to date picture of me and the kids for my bio grandad. He is 85 and had been diagonsed with bowel cancer which has spread. He has not got long to live. In my gut I have said I will go see him with the kids (which he has never met) as this is his last wish. He wants to see all the grandkids and great grandkids before he dies. I think it would be very selfish of me to ignore a dying mans last wish.
I personally don't know how to feel or how i am going to react seeing him. Also it will be the first time I have seen any of them since I was 19. I am doing the right thing visting them?
Also how am I going to exlain to my just 3 year old who they are. I feel like shit. When I was adopted I know they had no say in it. They where old and my Grandma suffers from parkinsons so she could not care for me. I am rambeling now but just so mixed up with my emotions I do not know how to feel.
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Going to vist my biological grandad on his death bed with the DC
5 replies
heathermumof3 · 21/08/2011 10:20
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