To Ask Parents Nicely to Say No to Their Children

(64 Posts)
Chockyeggpants Tue 09-Apr-13 16:26:39

And mean it and enforce it?
Many thanks.

yousankmybattleship Tue 09-Apr-13 16:29:22

What? Really? I thought we were supposed to say yes to everything? Dammit!

kinkyfuckery Tue 09-Apr-13 16:30:29

You parent your own children, leave others to parent theirs.

Flobbadobs Tue 09-Apr-13 16:31:15

I say No enough for about 6 parents...

PuppyMonkey Tue 09-Apr-13 16:31:17

Surely it depends what the question is grin

YABU to write such a short OP and expect people to comment on something with no context.

YABU to assume that parents should do as you say, just because you say it.

Say no about what? I say no sometimes, but I might say yes to things you wouldn't.

Maybe I should say no to you.

Chockyeggpants Tue 09-Apr-13 16:33:20

Kinky my DD ends up bearing the brunt of other poorly disciplined children's behaviour.

<Sigh> Ok, I'll ask...

In what circumstances specifically? Or, in other words - what did someone elses child do that pissed you off?

JollyPurpleGiant Tue 09-Apr-13 16:34:24

DS hasn't asked for anything unreasonable today. I'm not going to say "No, you can't have a banana" if there's no reason for him not to have a banana.

yousankmybattleship Tue 09-Apr-13 16:35:03

My son asked me earlier if he could read to me. I said yes. Feel I've failed him now as this little nugget of parenting advice came too late from OP.
I'll say no later when he asks to brush his teeth though.

Chockyeggpants Tue 09-Apr-13 16:35:09

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

You should say yes more. You can't change others only yourself.

ATouchOfStuffing Tue 09-Apr-13 16:37:57

On the other hand parents constantly bleating NO! are bloody annoying.

Hulababy Tue 09-Apr-13 16:38:37

Sometimes I say yes, sometimes I say no. It does very much depend on the specific circumstances at the time.

I suspect there are times when you say yes to your daughter that others would feel should have been a no, and vice versa.

See, I can't bear toddlers who shout, "NO" because that's all they hear. I try to alternate no, later, tomorrow and not for children.

Your request is lacking in context.

e.g.
Mummy little Chockyeggpants just took my toy, can I ask for it back?

Mummy I want what little Chockyeggpants is playing with, can I take it?

No is only appropriate as an answer to one of these scenarios.

What exactly is bothering you? What happened?

Having said that, given the tone of your 16:35 post I do wonder about the messages you've given to your child.

Chockyeggpants Tue 09-Apr-13 16:40:00

Yup Hula, probably. Good point.

All depends what the question is doesn't it?

HousewifeFromHeaven Tue 09-Apr-13 16:41:48

We need a tedious explanation!

OP you're just being silly. In some circumstances parents should say no more. In some they should say no less. If you're pissed off because Jocasta had ner hand stepped in whilst in the ball pit with Damian who was running riot then say so and we can all help with that. Asking if parents as a species should be absolutely negative is just absurd.

Chockyeggpants Tue 09-Apr-13 16:42:26

Sorry Chaz. I was looking at another post about children in restaurants etc also under AIBU. And just now DD has come home upset because 2 little charmers think its hilarious to push her belongings in to a drain...
Drip feeding now, so I'll leave it at that.

TBH I prefer to say yes. I grew up with a "NO" mother.

However, I do not tolerate bad manners or behaviour. So if your DD is suffering at the hands of another child, tell that childs parents.

SoupDragon Tue 09-Apr-13 16:45:42

OK, next time my children ask if they should play nicely with yours, I'll tell them "no"

Not saying no doesn't equal a poorly disciplined child.

Being illogical and unpredictable is the problem.

DC are rarely told no (yes, I am a lentil weaver) they are well disciplined. You can't take one tiny aspect of parenting and label it as the reason for poorly "disciplined" children.

IMO

A child told no inconsistently and for no good reason is poor discipline.

A child told no consistently and for a reason = Good

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