To think schools do not realise hassle of dress up days?

(245 Posts)
MariusEarlobe Fri 22-Feb-13 10:34:19

We will have had three in as many weeks!
China day
Victorian day
World book day

Each time ALL the other parents buy proper costumes, no one makes them, no home made attempts that used to win prizes for effort like my day so there is massive pressure to buy costumes or your child feels odd one out. They never fit the year after.

Our school is in a mixed social area from very poor to wealthy. It's a lot of pressure to find £10 for a costume each time for those on low income.

Dd s favourite book is Dork Diaries, I thought about sending her as the main character and amazing up normal clothes but dd won't as she will get called for no costume.

scampadoodle Fri 22-Feb-13 10:38:02

YANBU. We don't seem to have the pressure to spend money on it, but I find the thinking about it a right hassle as I have always loathed fancy dress & have no aptitude or imagination for it.

willyoulistentome Fri 22-Feb-13 10:38:41

YANBU - It's a total pain in the arse. I never fork out much, if anything, though. I always do my best to persuade the kids to dress up as something we can manage from stuff we already have at home.

frogspoon Fri 22-Feb-13 10:48:24

YANBU, 3 in 3 weeks is ridiculous and not a reasonable expectation for schools to ask of you.

Even if you did make your own costume, you would probably still need to buy at least a couple of items.

Have you thought about hiring a costume, it would be a little cheaper. Or maybe make friends with someone who can sew.

Arithmeticulous Fri 22-Feb-13 10:57:21

I counted 19 last school year. Do I win?

SooticaTheWitchesCat Fri 22-Feb-13 10:57:50

I love dress up days but I always make the costumes, I actually enjoy making them too smile. To be honest though people don't normally go over the top at our school.

ReluctantMother Fri 22-Feb-13 10:58:31

My department is trying to have a dress up day FOR THE STAFF! I don't bloody think so!

TomArchersSausage Fri 22-Feb-13 11:00:30

Yadnbu. They are a total pita a lazy default for every topic.
Even my dc are fed up with them nowhmm

MariusEarlobe Fri 22-Feb-13 11:01:29

19??? Bloody 19??

lisad123everybodydancenow Fri 22-Feb-13 11:04:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wolfiefan Fri 22-Feb-13 11:06:35

YANBU. I did think of offering to donate costumes I had bought. If a few parents did this every year then very soon no parents would have to pay out at all.

TomArchersSausage Fri 22-Feb-13 11:06:40

Do schools get extra Ofsted brownie points for them? What reason could there be for dressing up at every blimmin opportunity?confused

TheDoctrineOfSciAndNatureClub Fri 22-Feb-13 11:08:06

I buy from eBay because I don't have time or imagination or ability to make - it's not about being flash with cash

AGiddyKipperInOneHand Fri 22-Feb-13 11:09:37

Why don't you ask parents to donate the costumes to the school, so after a few years they have enough for the whole class, or the school could buy and sell them at lower prices...Also the parents who do make a good costume could make a bit of money from their craft, or even the buying/selling themselves?

FrameyMcFrame Fri 22-Feb-13 11:09:55

Give the school some feedback?

AGiddyKipperInOneHand Fri 22-Feb-13 11:11:30

more than one find-a-costume day a term is too many, though. 19 is like saying there's no point in buying a school uniform!

MariusEarlobe Fri 22-Feb-13 11:11:35

I had thought same about donating, dd s old school did this for Tudor day and had a box full for following years.

thebody Fri 22-Feb-13 11:12:01

Yes it's all for Ofsted brownie points but just stupid to have this many..

Sound out other parents views as I get they are pusses off as well and then tell the school.

LimeLeafLizard Fri 22-Feb-13 11:17:05

YANBU. I've also wondered why schools are so fond of dressing up - is it an ofsted thing.

It is very tedious if like me you have no creative skills and kids who don't like dressing up. I know a few people who have to pull together 3 costumes every time, either because of 3 kids in the school or 2 kids plus they are staff members.

I've found you do get better at fudging costumes together though. E.g. any animal - wear all grey / brown and make a mask.

steppemum Fri 22-Feb-13 11:18:48

we have loads. I quite like the idea, but one or two per year would be enough, then I could be inspired and put in the effort.

I always cobble together/make, as I cannot afford to buy and hate the ready made costume culture. My dd is happy with hers until she gets to school and sees a good off the peg one, makes her looks hand made and then she gets grumpy.

I also hate the prizes for best costume. This is essentially a prize for parents and you are dammed if you do and dammed if you don't. - If they give prize to best costume and it is always a bought one, it is saying that they want you to join in the buying a costume culture. If they always give it to the home made ones because they have put in 'more effort' then it is slagging those parents who work full time and just do not have the time to make 3 costumes. Can't win.

ds went as Tintin last year (he is a red head and we did a perfect jelled quiff, plus fours etc) he looked amazing and it was a good costume for a 10 year old who doesn't like dressing up. Most people at school didn't recognise who he was, and those who did said 'isn't that a film??' So I give up!

puddock Fri 22-Feb-13 11:19:52

ITA, they're a pain - I wouldn't mind trying to make a costume (and wouldn't buy one), but DS1, who is only 4, found the idea of dressing up rather than wearing his beloved new school uniform the single most upsetting thing about his first term in reception. I think the routine and predictability of school helped him settle, and this just threw him and made him very anxious.

We've had a few now, he just doesn't dress up, won't even take a prop or accessory as a token gesture. I won't force him, I make sure he understands that all the other children will be wearing something different, and he just goes in his uniform. I know they make sure he doesn't get excluded or given a hard time, but I still wish they'd ease off on it a bit.

TomArchersSausage Fri 22-Feb-13 11:20:26

What I don't understand is where has all this come from? Who decided that dressing up to excess was the lightbulb moment in the curriculum?

A good teacher can get the message across imaginatively without continual props and costumes from parents.

I think it can be a bit annoying when there's an expectation everyone can just do it no problem, like all families and children are the same.

I like the ideas of home/school partnership though.

But I wish schools could do more to recognise the diversity of families and children too ....

Encourage families to respond in a variety of ways, collect costumes that people can easily borrow, give out information about where costumes could be hired from, all those sort of things would help.

MammaTJ Fri 22-Feb-13 11:22:03

My DS has Vitctorian Day. They both had crazy hat day, then DD had Tudor Day.

ARRGGGHH!! YANBU!!

We seem to be getting more and more as DS1 gets older but they're mainly to do with the class topics- traditional tales etc... Jubilee was an exception and they all went in red white and blue. DS1 has home made where possible, Dick Whittington was fairly simple.

It's ridiculous when there's more than one per term!

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